Hey, StrawberryAlex here. Text walls are kinda how I am unfortunately so there's going to be one (it's why I lurk so hard everywhere), but I'm going to do my best to address everything I can. It's going to be very, VERY long regardless, but I've been writing this on and off the past couple days to make sure I didn't get too riled up again to be sure. I need to get some of this off my chest, and want to be able to move on from what was honestly more than a little bit of an overreaction that I immediately regretted.
Firstly, want to clear up that a lot of my reactions were due to a mix of lack of sleep, stress from the auction, and honestly Toxxitone pissing me off with their behavior and making my blood boil the instant they called poorer people "lesser". I've taken a step back, calmed down, and wanted to take time to address this without someone getting under my skin in a way I didn't think possible.
Secondly, I want to address the other elephant in the room. Personally I don't actually mind how others spend money on this game. I know it seemed like that's what I was hung up on and that it appeared that was the reason I was "throwing a fit" over not getting a dragon I wanted with my finite resources and whatnot. I'll also admit that a lot of what I said was very much being angry in the moment, and is not a reflection of how I generally view users who spend irl money, even large amounts, on FR. If someone wants to drop $10k on something cause they can so be it. It wound up being a focus because again, I can not understate just how much being called "lesser" in the thread infuriated me.
What made me back out, is the behavior I saw on their profile, as well as DMs I was receiving from the auction runner at the time. While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost. So while they said they COULD afford to spend the money, I still feel as though they didn't actually have as much as they were willing to throw at 100x777 as well as 100x666, and merely wanted the dragon because no one other than them deserved it.
To quote the auction runner from a DM: "It seemed like they were offering with good intent from the beginning, and did have specific plans with other dragons in mind, one of which they already owned, and the other planned to buy as well. When that changed and it seemed like they were continuing bidding because they didn't want to lose, and it was affecting both of us, is when I asked them to go public."
I can provide screenshots to a mod (if I can figure out how to privately do so) but I don't want to share publicly here as they are still DMs. There were a lot of DMs behind the scenes, and a majority of Toxxitone's behavior and comments are in those and unknown to me, whereas most of my own happens to be in that thread. I'd also like to not drag the auction runner into this as much as possible. I am also not going to contact the auction runner to get details about Toxxitone from their back and forth DMs.
All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire. The auction format of 100x777 very much did that in my eyes after I found out, and I didn't want any further part in such a thing.
For a bit of a reason and context of why I'm like this, I watched something similar happen to a former friend of mine that literally almost tore our entire friend group apart over a gacha game. We were here to have fun and poke at who had what and who was unlucky not to get something they had "whaled" over, despite us all (at the time) being F2P. This friend was decently well off, and decided to start spending a little for the stuff they wanted most after we encouraged them that it was okay to do so. To make a long story short, it ballooned out of control, they nearly went broke despite having "disposable income" to spend in such large amounts, and they neglected necessary charges such as student loans and rent for their addiction. All so they could have something we didn't and hold it over us, even as we told them we were far more focused on their bad spending habits than them getting another "rare" png. And all of us felt terrible after the blowup and that we were all partially the reason this happened to begin with. So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game.
So yeah, reading their clan profile message, seeing their behavior, and seeing how much irl cash they were willing to throw not only at this but later at 100x666, I backed out. I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted. Regardless of if they could've easily afforded it or not, I've seen the slippery slope of this happen to another that was "well off" like they were, and wanted none of it. Again, I overreacted and worded things very badly when I probably should've done a "Fuck you you're being an asshole about this" and left it at that.
This is already long enough, but to cover a couple other small things:
Cornix has the same amount of lair significance as a lamp in terms of lore in my lair. He's cool and sentimental, having hatched him myself and all, but my initial comments about him were made around 3am. Selling him wouldn't effect me all that heavily. He is quite literally a living plot device as he exists currently.
I contacted the owner of 100x666 to ensure Toxxitone wasn't spite bidding. The owner confirmed they were not, and the auction runner for 100x777 corroborated this after the auction was canceled. While there was no ill intent because they wanted that dragon anyways, I'm fairly certain they were attempting to rile me up again to make the whole situation even worse.
My plans for 100x777 was to acquire them and 100x666 and make them into a fun lineage pair to breed in celebration of FR's history. I didn't care about sunk cost, or making money back, only that I gave back to the community in allowing others who weren't around for 100mil or couldn't afford dragons from everyone hatching eggs. I didn't intend on selling them for massive amounts of gems, only 100kt/g tops save for maybe specific egg numbers (1st, 7th, and 13th respectively, but I probably would keep one and gift and/or raffle the others). To me that was worth the amount I was offering in the thread, and I was making sure I didn't sell anything I had genuine deep attachments to. What I expected in terms of a person to bid against into absurd amounts was someone like the owner of 777, not Toxxitone.
Anyways, as I said before, this is to get these thoughts out of my head and stop me from getting hung up on what happened. Regardless of what others think of me after this, having all of this off of my chest is all I really want. If I don't these things tend to eat at me and detract from the things I do that actually make me happy. I'll be lurking and might answer questions/respond to comments or remarks, but gauging the length of this post's preview (good god I'm sorry to everyone), I don't want to create the second longest text wall known to man on accident.
I know seeing the length of this alone will probably prevent most from reading more than a paragraph or two, but I'm sorry to those that hate me or blocked me over this. I know with how I responded that it was absolutely deserved with how unchecked and impulsive such a response was. Hindsight is 20/20 and all that.
I don't mean to sound callous but you're coming in here to somehow clear the air and your response is to double down on the very thing people are saying you're being ridiculous for?
You can say "I overreacted" until you're blue in the face, but "I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted" is still you making assumptions about an internet stranger's financial situation based on minimal evidence and being moralist about it like you're somehow protecting them from themself due to unrelated experiences with a completely different person.
"While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost."
Flight Rising caps gem expenditure at $3k USD/month. If someone is buying enough pure they have no choice but to wait several months unless they have treasure hoarded. Gem whales in this game often don't keep a lot of liquid treasure because it takes more effort to play G&G every day than to hit the Paypal button repeatedly.
"All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire."
Again, there you are trying to act like the sensible, responsible one despite not actually knowing this person beyond the single thread exchange.
"So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game."
Then you shouldn't be participating in high-value auctions at all, if it brings you back to such terrible memories. You could have stopped bidding at any point if you were getting uncomfortable.
I really hate that I am defending someone who used the word "lesser" like that because I'm not trying to argue that Toxx isn't a prick. They are. You're just also being condescending, just in a more socially palatable way.
"this person got in the way of me 'giving back to the community' (read: making a random breeding pair nobody would care about) and got me mad as hell. but it's okay since I actually only acted condescending because my friend got addicted to Love Live or some shit. now I am intimately familiar with gambling addiction which has nothing to do with auctions on any website and don't want anyone else who wants the PNG I want going down the same path 😔"
Tomatoes aren't hard enough BOOOOOOO 🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥
You worded it much more harshly than I would lol, but genuine question, is there enough of a market for hatchlings like this for 100kt/g a pop? Not the cool IDs themselves, but their offspring, on whose page you can't even see the ID? Not the big milestone ID parents anyone would covet like 1 million or repeating digits, but just kinda cool looking partials valued by specific collectors? Then again I know there's lineages I personally would never care about that still have their own thriving niches like the Naomi descendants, so I may be misguided about this one too.
it's reasonable to be uncomfortable when people start bringing in huge sums of IRL money to a video game to do battle against your dragon monopoly dollars. it's not reasonable to start lecturing these otherwise perfect strangers like you're their parent because of interpersonal relationships those people have nothing to do with turned into traumas that they don't need to be on the receiving end of.
gambling has its god awful thorns in everything and it's gone and ruined a lot of people's lives, but you said a lot of words that never needed to be said on the forums, and i'm gonna be real: you never should have posted them here, either. toxx said some things in the worst way possible (likely also due to whatever stress you were bringing into that auction unwarranted) and they are responsible for their own actions and words, but you could have prevented it by just saying so much less.
next time you write a confessional like this, consider deleting it before you send it. let it go. faceless internet people don't need to hear it.
as someone who also write essays, I completely agree with you.
It is one thing to be uncomfortable with someone else's spending habit. That is perfectly fine. It is also perfectly fine to back out of an auction due to that.
What isn't fine is trying to make it sound like you (speaking to Strawberry from now on) are taking the high ground and going on a multiple paragraph and post rant about their spending habits.
You know nothing about their spending habits, nor their financial situation. They might need help, a lot of people DO have financial issues/spending problems. Many people do have gambling issues. But, unless you are related to them, or know them personally, you are not their keeper, and you don't know their situation.
You going on about how your friend was irresponsible, and got addicted to spending money to get some sort of exclusive 'one up' or whatever in a game, and everything else is not going to help them. No matter your intention, you came across as jealous that they could spend that much, and like you were trying to shame them to back out of the auction so you could get the dragon yourself.
What Toxx said wasn't the best, I said in a different post, I wondered if it could be an ESL issue, if Toxx's first language isn't english. Or it was just poor wording. Regardless, it is fine to be irritated by the language, but again, going on a multiple post rant about it isn't going to help the person.
As the anon I replied to said, Toxx is responsible for their own words and actions, and you are responsible for YOURS.
You aren't going to change their mind about what they are doing, and they aren't going to change how you feel about it. So, again, as anon said, next time you feel the need to rant, just write it out and delete it.
To preface, I hope you're aware nothing good ever comes of wankers de-anoning themselves on here and this isn't going to be any different. Yeah we're all in agreement on that particular comment of Toxx's, but it was made AFTER you already dedicated TWO long ass posts to self-righteous indignation at their spending habits and oversharing yours, so that's already the wrong foot to start explaining yourself on.
If you're willing to take some well-meaning advice: All your posts, both this one and those in the auction thread, would be massively better off cut down to the bare minimum needed for effective and semi-respectful communication. Do not compulsively expose every detail of your thought process and life story to strangers, especially if or when you cannot help yourself from emotionally charging it, coming off the way you just did, and doing more harm than good. As you yourself acknowledged but didn't really adapt the mindset behind in the same post, "you're kind of a dick, bye" and "this gives me pause for personal reasons so I'm withdrawing" are infinitely more valid and sympathetic than "wow, money for a dragon png, have you no shame, I, the sensible, frugal and benevolent party, am declaring you a pitiable fool and a danger to yourself and myself better than supporting these self-destructive impulses because here's how much me and my husband bought a house for and also most of my friends except two or three are also poor, something something my hopes and dreams, I don't know if you own a car or not but do you realize this money would be better off buying a car, I sure would love one, dear Lord the children in Africa are starving, mr Auctioneer close the establishment we are done here". That's how you sounded, in the thread alone, without even getting into the rest of it. As much as you might want to get these thoughts out of your head, the reality is most of us don't need to hear them. If it's peace of mind you are after, refer back to the 1st sentence of the 1st paragraph of my post.
Also wat @ the 666 auction part. "There is no malicious intent, but I am fairly certain there is malicious intent"?? I'd understand the concern if the auction were for some completely unrelated dragon they just so mysteriously happened to follow you into, but there's nothing unusual about two people who were gunning hardcore for a specific ID both moving on to the next best thing after the first seller dropped out. Didn't you just quote 777's owner telling you outright Toxx was planning to buy other dragons like this before you even learned who you were bidding against? And contacting 666's owner, really? How would they know about the "spite bidding"?? Were you expecting Toxx to slide into their DMs to expose all the devilish plans they had of ruining your day like a Team Rocket grunt? That's all your own baseless assumptions getting away from you again. Considering you were the first to call out Toxx in that thread, and apparently already in the mindset they're out to get you, I can't think of a response they could give that WOULDN'T rile you up.
Okay so I've realized most of these posts have since become more rage bait to feed whatever narrative everyone's made for me, and get me riled up to respond in a way that only confirms what they think of me. There's no use in responding to such things because they'll just use whatever I say to further feed some image of me they've already made. First impressions, these just read as bait to me, or whatever. I made my post to get it off my chest, not to "clear the air". I'm not here to feed that so continue thinking what you will of me, but I do want to respond to the 100x666 part.
When I went to bid on 100x666, I was NOT aware that Toxx was going to bid on the dragon. They appeared right after, and out of concern, I sent a DM to the owner to make sure Toxx had actually showed interest/offered prior to their bid. I got a response back that said, "Yeah they're interested and not trying to spite you I promise. They even made an X number bid prior to the thread being posted." About an hour or so later, the auction runner for 100x777 sent their OWN DM that was apologizing for what happened to the auction and that for what it's worth Toxx was also planning on buying 100x666. Two different people confirmed but I didn't get the second confirmation from the previous auction runner until after I voiced my concern. I was not expecting Toxx to slide into DMs, but I thought maybe they may be a little upset and possibly seeking a reaction out of me like the users on here now are.
good lord. this is just excuses (i was tired! stressed! them being well-off made me feel bad!) for shitty behavior and doubling down on that behavior as well
you are not justified in making the judgements that you did. period! you AND the auction runner
This is very much a ESH situation, and your essay isn’t actually helping your cause. Toxx is an asshole for basically flaunting their wealth and making questionable comments, but so are you for being judgmental as hell about a complete strangers spending habits. When you knew you were no longer comfortable participating in the auction, you should have just ended your bids and backed out. You didn’t need to add a parting lecture to Toxx about how you have to save their poor soul from their bad decisions or whatever.
I know this sucks to hear, but some people legitimately just have a ton of disposable income. You don’t know Todd’s situation. They very well could just have a really good job or family money or something, and no debts/other necessities that take all their spare money. For all you know they could have won the lottery or something and are just sitting on a massive pile of cash they don’t have need for. You literally have no access to their bank account or anything to make judgement calls about how much they’re able to spend. The money isn’t just going to be set aflame - they’re helping to fund a small game site by spending it on there. It’s hardly the worst thing someone can do with their money (despite what that one goofy anon earlier thinks).
I also think it’s really shitty to imply they have a spending/game addiction or something because they are willing to drop a ton of cash on a game (again, that we can only assume they absolutely have at their disposal). It’s not even a gambling situation - if they loose the auction, they’re out zero dollars. They only pay if they actually win. I’d argue spending lots of money (albeit fake dragon money in your case) to get together a breeding pair that you can’t even guarantee will sell enough hatchlings to break even is far more risky.
i think whats MOST egregious is them DMing both auction runners. like... the fucking AUDACITY??? and they entertained it??? the auction runners are just as guilty of being shitty as strawberry imo. all three of them (strawb and the two auction runners, though the 666 guy less so) suck major butts
i dont even personally think toxx was flaunting their wealth. it was strawb expressing "worry" about their finances, which is NONE of their fucking business. id be telling them "uhhh im good tho?" too. hell, toxx was probably just trying to assuage them by telling them WHY they can afford this, because like i said, strawb is the one who brought it up. not toxx
whole lotta bullshit here-- emphasis is mine, a wall of text for your wall of text
"Secondly, I want to address the other elephant in the room. Personally I don't actually mind how others spend money on this game. I know it seemed like that's what I was hung up on and that it appeared that was the reason I was "throwing a fit" over not getting a dragon I wanted with my finite resources and whatnot. I'll also admit that a lot of what I said was very much being angry in the moment, and is not a reflection of how I generally view users who spend irl money, even large amounts, on FR. If someone wants to drop $10k on something cause they can so be it. It wound up being a focus because again, I can not understate just how much being called "lesser" in the thread infuriated me."
ok so we've established you do NOT mind if people spend money, up to $10k, on pixels, or how they spend that money.
"What made me back out, is the behavior I saw on their profile, as well as DMs I was receiving from the auction runner at the time. While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting [like] that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost. So while they said they COULD afford to spend the money, I still feel as though they didn't actually have as much as they were willing to throw at 100x777 as well as 100x666, and merely wanted the dragon because no one other than them deserved it."
ok we've established you made unfounded assumptions on Toxx's finances, which are none of your damn business tbqh
"All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire. The auction format of 100x777 very much did that in my eyes after I found out, and I didn't want any further part in such a thing."
ok so you DO care how people spend money, when you feel involved in how they spend it-- like someone else said, you probably shouldn't take part in auctions if you feel concerned about how someone else is affording a high price item.
"So yeah, reading their clan profile message, seeing their behavior, and seeing how much irl cash they were willing to throw not only at this but later at 100x666, I backed out. I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted. Regardless of if they could've easily afforded it or not, I've seen the slippery slope of this happen to another that was "well off" like they were, and wanted none of it. Again, I overreacted and worded things very badly when I probably should've done a "Fuck you you're being an asshole about this" and left it at that."
ok one, ur not responsible. Toxx is responsible for their own financial decisions. two, you're making assumptions about their finances that aren't your biz. and you're making a judgement about that decision ("bad") so yes you do care about how people spend money on pixels
"For a bit of a reason and context of why I'm like this, [my friend got addicted to a gacha game and almost went broke and i felt responsible because i encouraged it/said it was ok to spend money on the game] And all of us felt terrible after the blowup and that we were all partially the reason this happened to begin with. So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game."
ok so again. you DO care how people spend money on pixels. you DO care how much people spend. you've got some personal trauma, fine. it's fine if you hate gambling games due to your experience (not sure why you're here tho since eggs, chests, NotN, etc. are all gambling lite). but you simultaneously say you don't care and then go into great detail about why you DEFINITELY care. YOU DO CARE. YOU REALLY DO, BUDDY. just get on your soapbox and say you hate gambling. that's fine, a lot of people do. it's fine to say 'hey imma back out due to personal reasons regarding spending IRL money on a game, i wish you well' but tbh i don't think that's the whole story, i think it's just the part of the story you're gonna tell the loudest and at most length bc it makes you seem sympathetic.
"My plans for 100x777 was to acquire them and 100x666 and make them into a fun lineage pair to breed in celebration of FR's history. I didn't care about sunk cost, or making money back, only that I gave back to the community in allowing others who weren't around for 100mil or couldn't afford dragons from everyone hatching eggs. I didn't intend on selling them for massive amounts of gems, only 100kt/g tops save for maybe specific egg numbers (1st, 7th, and 13th respectively, but I probably would keep one and gift and/or raffle the others). To me that was worth the amount I was offering in the thread, and I was making sure I didn't sell anything I had genuine deep attachments to. What I expected in terms of a person to bid against into absurd amounts was someone like the owner of 777, not Toxxitone."
ok imma be real, no one cares what u were gonna do with them. this sounds like moral bullshit to make yourself sound like the better person because you would share/"give back" by selling hatchlings for 100kt a pop (lmao) orrrr if this is supposed to be part of an explanation for why you could justify spending a lot of gems (recoup losses) vs Toxx buying gems with no financial plan to recoup losses... i don't fucking care bro, and neither should you because you allegedly "don't actually mind how others spend money on this game."
SA also. i 100000% think part of you was jealous that Toxx COULD throw down $$$ for a dragon you wanted. and i GET THAT, but u gotta hold that L, not make it some moral bs about 'i'm the better person because i'm thinking of YOUR wellbeing' cuz that ain't it, or it ain't the whole story. and ALSO, no it was not all triggered by the "lesser" comment because ALL OF THIS WAS SAID BEFORE TOXX CALLED ANYONE "LESSER"
"I am not having you risk your own irl wellbeing over a bunch of pixels." [unfounded financial assumption]
"spending more than I spent in the process of buying the home I bought this year (split between myself and my husband)" [you're judging how they spend their money because you DO care]
"I am not going to be putting the literal risk of another user's own finances at stake over a single dragon." [unfounded financial assumptions]
"That's foolishness in my eyes" [moral judgement]
"And @/Toxxitone it's not """fun""" to spend $3k on a dragon if that's ALL you're doing to get the money for this." [aka 'you're only allowed to spend lots of gems if you do it the way I do it, otherwise it's not fun for me']
"That's not a fun way to run an auction and again, as someone who has actively "thrown" that amount of money irl for stuff I've dreamt of irl, it's not worth the pixels." ['it's not fun if you Pay To Win, and I personally don't value pixels with real money']
"Sorry if you think throwing an amount some people would buy a car with if fun to you but it's not for me. I was bidding in assets and knowing someone was bidding in what was essentially "real money" made me feel gross and worry about you more than actually having fun anymore." [judging how they spend their money + implying earning FR currency via in-game assets is the better way to play]
literally mostly 'it's not fun when you Pay To Win when it's something I want' + 'i judge you for spending money that i personally would spend on other things, like a house or a car'
sidenote where the FUCK do you live that $3k is enough for what i assume was downpayment on a house???
The responses to you are insane here, you were not being an asshole and this makes your reaction even more understandable dw you got some people in your corner
Moralism over Schrödinger's house bill being forsook for the dragon game is goofy behavior and pretending getting the prestige from running a lineage hatchery is giving back to the community is arrogant. JS.
If you find that kind of thing cool idk what to tell you.
"While there was no ill intent because they wanted that dragon anyways, I'm fairly certain they were attempting to rile me up again to make the whole situation even worse."
You instigating AND escalating the second interaction and turning around and blaming them for it is wild
I don't know HTML formatting. If I could bold/italicize/underline things I could and I'm trying to limit caps to reduce the amount of "yelling" tone it can represent.
Replying to myself because trying to respond to a single individual, let alone multiple, is a fool's errand. I'm mostly responding because I feel like I didn't convey some of my thoughts/opinions correctly. I am not actively upset or mad or venting or whatever anymore (a lot of the initial post carried my residual frustrations and was venting to vent), and I apologize if my tone comes off as such now. It's not hanging on my mind anymore. I just feel like replying to a couple things I read after work.
I'm also limiting what I'm going to address here. I could respond to everything thrown at me but I won't mostly because I don't want to put forth the energy. I want to say some of you have made good arguments and points I can agree with in a way that doesn't feel like an attack and that I am going to try and reflect on those. Then there are others I still personally read as more trying to be more aggressive and feel like they're trying to get me to act/react a certain way. So I'm going to TRY and keep this as short a possible.
First, some of you are making the same exact assumptions about my own financial situation and circumstances. A lot of you are also telling me exactly what I should do and the """correct""" way I should have approached things. I came here to vent frustrations and get them off my chest because my usual methods I use weren't working so I made the decision to let this be torn into.
Also I realize I worded it horribly but $3k was HALF of what we paid and $3k was an amount I paid (aka: my own finances; we went 50/50 on all costs; ~6k was purely downpayment), it IS a house, and we did have a first-time homebuyers program we went through in order to afford it. This was a weird thing to see so many people hung up on, and I'm also not liking where some of the responses went with that. Also we were renting a mobile home prior to the house and it was very nice compared to all the stereotypes associated with them.
And since it's still I guess a bit of the focus, my standing on the whole spending irl money discussion is that there is a difference in if I am directly involved in some capacity or not. Every time someone decides to spend $1k on something I'm not going to swoop in immediately and say they're wrong for it and be better off spending it on XYZ. If I AM involved however, such as this auction, I AM going to feel at least a little responsible that someone HAS to spend a large sum of money to get what we're bidding on due to me continuing to bid. No amount of "it's not your money so it's not your responsibility" won't change how it makes me feel about seeing the behavior. And to the person who told me not to bid on ANY auctions because of this, there's a big difference in $10/1kg, $100/10kg, and $1000/100kg, and I know the average player has a lot easier time acquiring the first two without spending irl money.
Finally, because apparently this is STILL mixed up, there were two completely different contexts for the DMs I sent to first and second auction runners. The first auction runner was continuing an ongoing conversation, asking what my plans had been and were apologizing for cancelling the auction and gave their reasons for cancelling it. I responded and didn't get a reply from the first auctioneer until AFTER the bidding on 100x666 started (and subsequently ended). I got a response from the second auctioneer before the first told me Toxx's own plans to try and get both dragons but not what they intended to do with them. My DM to the second auctioneer basically consisted of, "Hey, this just happened and I saw both of us are in your auction now. Can you confirm that they had genuine interest and aren't participating to possibly spite me?" I knew it was likely we were just interested in the same dragons, but I wanted to make sure because everything else went down right before the auction went live.
I didn't go on some sort of attack against Toxx or the auction runners. I didn't ask if Toxx was spiting me the whole time for the first auction. I didn't even ask the first auctioneer if Toxx wanted 100x666 as well. That piece of information was given separately and entirely unprovoked. For the second auction, I simply wanted to avoid a similar situation in case this DID wind up being related, especially so soon after the 100x777 auction.
That's all I'm addressing here. Anything else I could write about are all topics that will get ripped apart further. All I have left to say is I was definitely in the wrong for my treatment and judgment of Toxx in all of this (even if they are still an asshole in my eyes) and I can accept and agree with some of what was said and try not to repeat it in the future. I think I got the message textually beaten into my skull enough that I'm not letting anyone tell me how to run my life, so I'll try not to do the same.
can someone call someone else a bitch on FRD or something so we can have something else to talk about....... love and light to AIRT but im not reading your novel. genuinely wish you the best with this, dont get me wrong, but this is probably not the place to write essays defending yourself
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(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 02:24 am (UTC)(link)Firstly, want to clear up that a lot of my reactions were due to a mix of lack of sleep, stress from the auction, and honestly Toxxitone pissing me off with their behavior and making my blood boil the instant they called poorer people "lesser". I've taken a step back, calmed down, and wanted to take time to address this without someone getting under my skin in a way I didn't think possible.
Secondly, I want to address the other elephant in the room. Personally I don't actually mind how others spend money on this game. I know it seemed like that's what I was hung up on and that it appeared that was the reason I was "throwing a fit" over not getting a dragon I wanted with my finite resources and whatnot. I'll also admit that a lot of what I said was very much being angry in the moment, and is not a reflection of how I generally view users who spend irl money, even large amounts, on FR. If someone wants to drop $10k on something cause they can so be it. It wound up being a focus because again, I can not understate just how much being called "lesser" in the thread infuriated me.
What made me back out, is the behavior I saw on their profile, as well as DMs I was receiving from the auction runner at the time. While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost. So while they said they COULD afford to spend the money, I still feel as though they didn't actually have as much as they were willing to throw at 100x777 as well as 100x666, and merely wanted the dragon because no one other than them deserved it.
To quote the auction runner from a DM:
"It seemed like they were offering with good intent from the beginning, and did have specific plans with other dragons in mind, one of which they already owned, and the other planned to buy as well. When that changed and it seemed like they were continuing bidding because they didn't want to lose, and it was affecting both of us, is when I asked them to go public."
I can provide screenshots to a mod (if I can figure out how to privately do so) but I don't want to share publicly here as they are still DMs. There were a lot of DMs behind the scenes, and a majority of Toxxitone's behavior and comments are in those and unknown to me, whereas most of my own happens to be in that thread. I'd also like to not drag the auction runner into this as much as possible. I am also not going to contact the auction runner to get details about Toxxitone from their back and forth DMs.
All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire. The auction format of 100x777 very much did that in my eyes after I found out, and I didn't want any further part in such a thing.
For a bit of a reason and context of why I'm like this, I watched something similar happen to a former friend of mine that literally almost tore our entire friend group apart over a gacha game. We were here to have fun and poke at who had what and who was unlucky not to get something they had "whaled" over, despite us all (at the time) being F2P. This friend was decently well off, and decided to start spending a little for the stuff they wanted most after we encouraged them that it was okay to do so. To make a long story short, it ballooned out of control, they nearly went broke despite having "disposable income" to spend in such large amounts, and they neglected necessary charges such as student loans and rent for their addiction. All so they could have something we didn't and hold it over us, even as we told them we were far more focused on their bad spending habits than them getting another "rare" png. And all of us felt terrible after the blowup and that we were all partially the reason this happened to begin with. So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game.
So yeah, reading their clan profile message, seeing their behavior, and seeing how much irl cash they were willing to throw not only at this but later at 100x666, I backed out. I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted. Regardless of if they could've easily afforded it or not, I've seen the slippery slope of this happen to another that was "well off" like they were, and wanted none of it. Again, I overreacted and worded things very badly when I probably should've done a "Fuck you you're being an asshole about this" and left it at that.
This is already long enough, but to cover a couple other small things:
Cornix has the same amount of lair significance as a lamp in terms of lore in my lair. He's cool and sentimental, having hatched him myself and all, but my initial comments about him were made around 3am. Selling him wouldn't effect me all that heavily. He is quite literally a living plot device as he exists currently.
I contacted the owner of 100x666 to ensure Toxxitone wasn't spite bidding. The owner confirmed they were not, and the auction runner for 100x777 corroborated this after the auction was canceled. While there was no ill intent because they wanted that dragon anyways, I'm fairly certain they were attempting to rile me up again to make the whole situation even worse.
My plans for 100x777 was to acquire them and 100x666 and make them into a fun lineage pair to breed in celebration of FR's history. I didn't care about sunk cost, or making money back, only that I gave back to the community in allowing others who weren't around for 100mil or couldn't afford dragons from everyone hatching eggs. I didn't intend on selling them for massive amounts of gems, only 100kt/g tops save for maybe specific egg numbers (1st, 7th, and 13th respectively, but I probably would keep one and gift and/or raffle the others). To me that was worth the amount I was offering in the thread, and I was making sure I didn't sell anything I had genuine deep attachments to. What I expected in terms of a person to bid against into absurd amounts was someone like the owner of 777, not Toxxitone.
Anyways, as I said before, this is to get these thoughts out of my head and stop me from getting hung up on what happened. Regardless of what others think of me after this, having all of this off of my chest is all I really want. If I don't these things tend to eat at me and detract from the things I do that actually make me happy. I'll be lurking and might answer questions/respond to comments or remarks, but gauging the length of this post's preview (good god I'm sorry to everyone), I don't want to create the second longest text wall known to man on accident.
I know seeing the length of this alone will probably prevent most from reading more than a paragraph or two, but I'm sorry to those that hate me or blocked me over this. I know with how I responded that it was absolutely deserved with how unchecked and impulsive such a response was. Hindsight is 20/20 and all that.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 02:56 am (UTC)(link)There's no way to tell someone "I can't control you but I don't want to speed up your self-destruction" without splash damage.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 04:51 am (UTC)(link)You can say "I overreacted" until you're blue in the face, but "I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted" is still you making assumptions about an internet stranger's financial situation based on minimal evidence and being moralist about it like you're somehow protecting them from themself due to unrelated experiences with a completely different person.
"While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost."
Flight Rising caps gem expenditure at $3k USD/month. If someone is buying enough pure they have no choice but to wait several months unless they have treasure hoarded. Gem whales in this game often don't keep a lot of liquid treasure because it takes more effort to play G&G every day than to hit the Paypal button repeatedly.
"All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire."
Again, there you are trying to act like the sensible, responsible one despite not actually knowing this person beyond the single thread exchange.
"So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game."
Then you shouldn't be participating in high-value auctions at all, if it brings you back to such terrible memories. You could have stopped bidding at any point if you were getting uncomfortable.
I really hate that I am defending someone who used the word "lesser" like that because I'm not trying to argue that Toxx isn't a prick. They are. You're just also being condescending, just in a more socially palatable way.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 10:14 am (UTC)(link)Tomatoes aren't hard enough BOOOOOOO 🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥🥥
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 12:51 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 12:31 pm (UTC)(link)it's reasonable to be uncomfortable when people start bringing in huge sums of IRL money to a video game to do battle against your dragon monopoly dollars. it's not reasonable to start lecturing these otherwise perfect strangers like you're their parent because of interpersonal relationships those people have nothing to do with turned into traumas that they don't need to be on the receiving end of.
gambling has its god awful thorns in everything and it's gone and ruined a lot of people's lives, but you said a lot of words that never needed to be said on the forums, and i'm gonna be real: you never should have posted them here, either. toxx said some things in the worst way possible (likely also due to whatever stress you were bringing into that auction unwarranted) and they are responsible for their own actions and words, but you could have prevented it by just saying so much less.
next time you write a confessional like this, consider deleting it before you send it. let it go. faceless internet people don't need to hear it.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 02:06 pm (UTC)(link)It is one thing to be uncomfortable with someone else's spending habit. That is perfectly fine. It is also perfectly fine to back out of an auction due to that.
What isn't fine is trying to make it sound like you (speaking to Strawberry from now on) are taking the high ground and going on a multiple paragraph and post rant about their spending habits.
You know nothing about their spending habits, nor their financial situation. They might need help, a lot of people DO have financial issues/spending problems. Many people do have gambling issues. But, unless you are related to them, or know them personally, you are not their keeper, and you don't know their situation.
You going on about how your friend was irresponsible, and got addicted to spending money to get some sort of exclusive 'one up' or whatever in a game, and everything else is not going to help them. No matter your intention, you came across as jealous that they could spend that much, and like you were trying to shame them to back out of the auction so you could get the dragon yourself.
What Toxx said wasn't the best, I said in a different post, I wondered if it could be an ESL issue, if Toxx's first language isn't english. Or it was just poor wording. Regardless, it is fine to be irritated by the language, but again, going on a multiple post rant about it isn't going to help the person.
As the anon I replied to said, Toxx is responsible for their own words and actions, and you are responsible for YOURS.
You aren't going to change their mind about what they are doing, and they aren't going to change how you feel about it. So, again, as anon said, next time you feel the need to rant, just write it out and delete it.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 12:38 pm (UTC)(link)If you're willing to take some well-meaning advice: All your posts, both this one and those in the auction thread, would be massively better off cut down to the bare minimum needed for effective and semi-respectful communication. Do not compulsively expose every detail of your thought process and life story to strangers, especially if or when you cannot help yourself from emotionally charging it, coming off the way you just did, and doing more harm than good. As you yourself acknowledged but didn't really adapt the mindset behind in the same post, "you're kind of a dick, bye" and "this gives me pause for personal reasons so I'm withdrawing" are infinitely more valid and sympathetic than "wow, money for a dragon png, have you no shame, I, the sensible, frugal and benevolent party, am declaring you a pitiable fool and a danger to yourself and myself better than supporting these self-destructive impulses because here's how much me and my husband bought a house for and also most of my friends except two or three are also poor, something something my hopes and dreams, I don't know if you own a car or not but do you realize this money would be better off buying a car, I sure would love one, dear Lord the children in Africa are starving,
Also wat @ the 666 auction part. "There is no malicious intent, but I am fairly certain there is malicious intent"?? I'd understand the concern if the auction were for some completely unrelated dragon they just so mysteriously happened to follow you into, but there's nothing unusual about two people who were gunning hardcore for a specific ID both moving on to the next best thing after the first seller dropped out. Didn't you just quote 777's owner telling you outright Toxx was planning to buy other dragons like this before you even learned who you were bidding against? And contacting 666's owner, really? How would they know about the "spite bidding"?? Were you expecting Toxx to slide into their DMs to expose all the devilish plans they had of ruining your day like a Team Rocket grunt? That's all your own baseless assumptions getting away from you again. Considering you were the first to call out Toxx in that thread, and apparently already in the mindset they're out to get you, I can't think of a response they could give that WOULDN'T rile you up.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 01:59 pm (UTC)(link)When I went to bid on 100x666, I was NOT aware that Toxx was going to bid on the dragon. They appeared right after, and out of concern, I sent a DM to the owner to make sure Toxx had actually showed interest/offered prior to their bid. I got a response back that said, "Yeah they're interested and not trying to spite you I promise. They even made an X number bid prior to the thread being posted." About an hour or so later, the auction runner for 100x777 sent their OWN DM that was apologizing for what happened to the auction and that for what it's worth Toxx was also planning on buying 100x666. Two different people confirmed but I didn't get the second confirmation from the previous auction runner until after I voiced my concern. I was not expecting Toxx to slide into DMs, but I thought maybe they may be a little upset and possibly seeking a reaction out of me like the users on here now are.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-08 15:21 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
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(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 05:30 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 02:08 pm (UTC)(link)you are not justified in making the judgements that you did. period! you AND the auction runner
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
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(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 02:12 pm (UTC)(link)i'm happy for u tho
or sorry that happened /lh
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:06 pm (UTC)(link)I know this sucks to hear, but some people legitimately just have a ton of disposable income. You don’t know Todd’s situation. They very well could just have a really good job or family money or something, and no debts/other necessities that take all their spare money. For all you know they could have won the lottery or something and are just sitting on a massive pile of cash they don’t have need for. You literally have no access to their bank account or anything to make judgement calls about how much they’re able to spend. The money isn’t just going to be set aflame - they’re helping to fund a small game site by spending it on there. It’s hardly the worst thing someone can do with their money (despite what that one goofy anon earlier thinks).
I also think it’s really shitty to imply they have a spending/game addiction or something because they are willing to drop a ton of cash on a game (again, that we can only assume they absolutely have at their disposal). It’s not even a gambling situation - if they loose the auction, they’re out zero dollars. They only pay if they actually win. I’d argue spending lots of money (albeit fake dragon money in your case) to get together a breeding pair that you can’t even guarantee will sell enough hatchlings to break even is far more risky.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:23 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:44 pm (UTC)(link)i dont even personally think toxx was flaunting their wealth. it was strawb expressing "worry" about their finances, which is NONE of their fucking business. id be telling them "uhhh im good tho?" too. hell, toxx was probably just trying to assuage them by telling them WHY they can afford this, because like i said, strawb is the one who brought it up. not toxx
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-08 18:09 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:22 pm (UTC)(link)"Secondly, I want to address the other elephant in the room. Personally I don't actually mind how others spend money on this game. I know it seemed like that's what I was hung up on and that it appeared that was the reason I was "throwing a fit" over not getting a dragon I wanted with my finite resources and whatnot. I'll also admit that a lot of what I said was very much being angry in the moment, and is not a reflection of how I generally view users who spend irl money, even large amounts, on FR. If someone wants to drop $10k on something cause they can so be it. It wound up being a focus because again, I can not understate just how much being called "lesser" in the thread infuriated me."
ok so we've established you do NOT mind if people spend money, up to $10k, on pixels, or how they spend that money.
"What made me back out, is the behavior I saw on their profile, as well as DMs I was receiving from the auction runner at the time. While yes, Toxxitone COULD pay that amount in cash, a) it sounded like they needed the months-long hold in order to buy all the gems needed, and b) they were acting [like] that the dragon had to be theirs no matter the cost. So while they said they COULD afford to spend the money, I still feel as though they didn't actually have as much as they were willing to throw at 100x777 as well as 100x666, and merely wanted the dragon because no one other than them deserved it."
ok we've established you made unfounded assumptions on Toxx's finances, which are none of your damn business tbqh
"All of this is to say that I guess the "real" reason I backed out is that I don't want to be the one enabling this person to make these financial decisions. They can spend that $5k on their own time on different "fun bad ideas", but I don't want to be the one validating that it's what they need to do to get anything they desire. The auction format of 100x777 very much did that in my eyes after I found out, and I didn't want any further part in such a thing."
ok so you DO care how people spend money, when you feel involved in how they spend it-- like someone else said, you probably shouldn't take part in auctions if you feel concerned about how someone else is affording a high price item.
"So yeah, reading their clan profile message, seeing their behavior, and seeing how much irl cash they were willing to throw not only at this but later at 100x666, I backed out. I don't want to hold any sort of responsibility in enabling what could very well be bad financial decisions because they didn't want anyone other than themselves getting the dragon(s) they wanted. Regardless of if they could've easily afforded it or not, I've seen the slippery slope of this happen to another that was "well off" like they were, and wanted none of it. Again, I overreacted and worded things very badly when I probably should've done a "Fuck you you're being an asshole about this" and left it at that."
ok one, ur not responsible. Toxx is responsible for their own financial decisions. two, you're making assumptions about their finances that aren't your biz. and you're making a judgement about that decision ("bad") so yes you do care about how people spend money on pixels
"For a bit of a reason and context of why I'm like this, [my friend got addicted to a gacha game and almost went broke and i felt responsible because i encouraged it/said it was ok to spend money on the game] And all of us felt terrible after the blowup and that we were all partially the reason this happened to begin with. So I no longer play such games, and I no longer try to encourage anyone to spend large amounts of money on any game."
ok so again. you DO care how people spend money on pixels. you DO care how much people spend. you've got some personal trauma, fine. it's fine if you hate gambling games due to your experience (not sure why you're here tho since eggs, chests, NotN, etc. are all gambling lite). but you simultaneously say you don't care and then go into great detail about why you DEFINITELY care. YOU DO CARE. YOU REALLY DO, BUDDY. just get on your soapbox and say you hate gambling. that's fine, a lot of people do. it's fine to say 'hey imma back out due to personal reasons regarding spending IRL money on a game, i wish you well' but tbh i don't think that's the whole story, i think it's just the part of the story you're gonna tell the loudest and at most length bc it makes you seem sympathetic.
"My plans for 100x777 was to acquire them and 100x666 and make them into a fun lineage pair to breed in celebration of FR's history. I didn't care about sunk cost, or making money back, only that I gave back to the community in allowing others who weren't around for 100mil or couldn't afford dragons from everyone hatching eggs. I didn't intend on selling them for massive amounts of gems, only 100kt/g tops save for maybe specific egg numbers (1st, 7th, and 13th respectively, but I probably would keep one and gift and/or raffle the others). To me that was worth the amount I was offering in the thread, and I was making sure I didn't sell anything I had genuine deep attachments to. What I expected in terms of a person to bid against into absurd amounts was someone like the owner of 777, not Toxxitone."
ok imma be real, no one cares what u were gonna do with them. this sounds like moral bullshit to make yourself sound like the better person because you would share/"give back" by selling hatchlings for 100kt a pop (lmao) orrrr if this is supposed to be part of an explanation for why you could justify spending a lot of gems (recoup losses) vs Toxx buying gems with no financial plan to recoup losses... i don't fucking care bro, and neither should you because you allegedly "don't actually mind how others spend money on this game."
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:25 pm (UTC)(link)also. i 100000% think part of you was jealous that Toxx COULD throw down $$$ for a dragon you wanted. and i GET THAT, but u gotta hold that L, not make it some moral bs about 'i'm the better person because i'm thinking of YOUR wellbeing' cuz that ain't it, or it ain't the whole story. and ALSO, no it was not all triggered by the "lesser" comment because ALL OF THIS WAS SAID BEFORE TOXX CALLED ANYONE "LESSER"
"I am not having you risk your own irl wellbeing over a bunch of pixels." [unfounded financial assumption]
"spending more than I spent in the process of buying the home I bought this year (split between myself and my husband)" [you're judging how they spend their money because you DO care]
"I am not going to be putting the literal risk of another user's own finances at stake over a single dragon." [unfounded financial assumptions]
"That's foolishness in my eyes" [moral judgement]
"And @/Toxxitone it's not """fun""" to spend $3k on a dragon if that's ALL you're doing to get the money for this." [aka 'you're only allowed to spend lots of gems if you do it the way I do it, otherwise it's not fun for me']
"That's not a fun way to run an auction and again, as someone who has actively "thrown" that amount of money irl for stuff I've dreamt of irl, it's not worth the pixels." ['it's not fun if you Pay To Win, and I personally don't value pixels with real money']
"Sorry if you think throwing an amount some people would buy a car with if fun to you but it's not for me. I was bidding in assets and knowing someone was bidding in what was essentially "real money" made me feel gross and worry about you more than actually having fun anymore." [judging how they spend their money + implying earning FR currency via in-game assets is the better way to play]
literally mostly 'it's not fun when you Pay To Win when it's something I want' + 'i judge you for spending money that i personally would spend on other things, like a house or a car'
sidenote where the FUCK do you live that $3k is enough for what i assume was downpayment on a house???
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-08 15:32 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
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(Anonymous) - 2025-01-08 23:09 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) SA
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(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:39 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:45 pm (UTC)(link)If you find that kind of thing cool idk what to tell you.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)You instigating AND escalating the second interaction and turning around and blaming them for it is wild
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 01:45 am (UTC)(link)Replying to myself because trying to respond to a single individual, let alone multiple, is a fool's errand. I'm mostly responding because I feel like I didn't convey some of my thoughts/opinions correctly. I am not actively upset or mad or venting or whatever anymore (a lot of the initial post carried my residual frustrations and was venting to vent), and I apologize if my tone comes off as such now. It's not hanging on my mind anymore. I just feel like replying to a couple things I read after work.
I'm also limiting what I'm going to address here. I could respond to everything thrown at me but I won't mostly because I don't want to put forth the energy. I want to say some of you have made good arguments and points I can agree with in a way that doesn't feel like an attack and that I am going to try and reflect on those. Then there are others I still personally read as more trying to be more aggressive and feel like they're trying to get me to act/react a certain way. So I'm going to TRY and keep this as short a possible.
First, some of you are making the same exact assumptions about my own financial situation and circumstances. A lot of you are also telling me exactly what I should do and the """correct""" way I should have approached things. I came here to vent frustrations and get them off my chest because my usual methods I use weren't working so I made the decision to let this be torn into.
Also I realize I worded it horribly but $3k was HALF of what we paid and $3k was an amount I paid (aka: my own finances; we went 50/50 on all costs; ~6k was purely downpayment), it IS a house, and we did have a first-time homebuyers program we went through in order to afford it. This was a weird thing to see so many people hung up on, and I'm also not liking where some of the responses went with that. Also we were renting a mobile home prior to the house and it was very nice compared to all the stereotypes associated with them.
And since it's still I guess a bit of the focus, my standing on the whole spending irl money discussion is that there is a difference in if I am directly involved in some capacity or not. Every time someone decides to spend $1k on something I'm not going to swoop in immediately and say they're wrong for it and be better off spending it on XYZ. If I AM involved however, such as this auction, I AM going to feel at least a little responsible that someone HAS to spend a large sum of money to get what we're bidding on due to me continuing to bid. No amount of "it's not your money so it's not your responsibility" won't change how it makes me feel about seeing the behavior. And to the person who told me not to bid on ANY auctions because of this, there's a big difference in $10/1kg, $100/10kg, and $1000/100kg, and I know the average player has a lot easier time acquiring the first two without spending irl money.
Finally, because apparently this is STILL mixed up, there were two completely different contexts for the DMs I sent to first and second auction runners. The first auction runner was continuing an ongoing conversation, asking what my plans had been and were apologizing for cancelling the auction and gave their reasons for cancelling it. I responded and didn't get a reply from the first auctioneer until AFTER the bidding on 100x666 started (and subsequently ended). I got a response from the second auctioneer before the first told me Toxx's own plans to try and get both dragons but not what they intended to do with them. My DM to the second auctioneer basically consisted of, "Hey, this just happened and I saw both of us are in your auction now. Can you confirm that they had genuine interest and aren't participating to possibly spite me?" I knew it was likely we were just interested in the same dragons, but I wanted to make sure because everything else went down right before the auction went live.
I didn't go on some sort of attack against Toxx or the auction runners. I didn't ask if Toxx was spiting me the whole time for the first auction. I didn't even ask the first auctioneer if Toxx wanted 100x666 as well. That piece of information was given separately and entirely unprovoked. For the second auction, I simply wanted to avoid a similar situation in case this DID wind up being related, especially so soon after the 100x777 auction.
That's all I'm addressing here. Anything else I could write about are all topics that will get ripped apart further. All I have left to say is I was definitely in the wrong for my treatment and judgment of Toxx in all of this (even if they are still an asshole in my eyes) and I can accept and agree with some of what was said and try not to repeat it in the future. I think I got the message textually beaten into my skull enough that I'm not letting anyone tell me how to run my life, so I'll try not to do the same.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 02:09 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
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(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 02:46 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 03:10 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 04:56 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
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