To preface, I hope you're aware nothing good ever comes of wankers de-anoning themselves on here and this isn't going to be any different. Yeah we're all in agreement on that particular comment of Toxx's, but it was made AFTER you already dedicated TWO long ass posts to self-righteous indignation at their spending habits and oversharing yours, so that's already the wrong foot to start explaining yourself on.
If you're willing to take some well-meaning advice: All your posts, both this one and those in the auction thread, would be massively better off cut down to the bare minimum needed for effective and semi-respectful communication. Do not compulsively expose every detail of your thought process and life story to strangers, especially if or when you cannot help yourself from emotionally charging it, coming off the way you just did, and doing more harm than good. As you yourself acknowledged but didn't really adapt the mindset behind in the same post, "you're kind of a dick, bye" and "this gives me pause for personal reasons so I'm withdrawing" are infinitely more valid and sympathetic than "wow, money for a dragon png, have you no shame, I, the sensible, frugal and benevolent party, am declaring you a pitiable fool and a danger to yourself and myself better than supporting these self-destructive impulses because here's how much me and my husband bought a house for and also most of my friends except two or three are also poor, something something my hopes and dreams, I don't know if you own a car or not but do you realize this money would be better off buying a car, I sure would love one, dear Lord the children in Africa are starving, mr Auctioneer close the establishment we are done here". That's how you sounded, in the thread alone, without even getting into the rest of it. As much as you might want to get these thoughts out of your head, the reality is most of us don't need to hear them. If it's peace of mind you are after, refer back to the 1st sentence of the 1st paragraph of my post.
Also wat @ the 666 auction part. "There is no malicious intent, but I am fairly certain there is malicious intent"?? I'd understand the concern if the auction were for some completely unrelated dragon they just so mysteriously happened to follow you into, but there's nothing unusual about two people who were gunning hardcore for a specific ID both moving on to the next best thing after the first seller dropped out. Didn't you just quote 777's owner telling you outright Toxx was planning to buy other dragons like this before you even learned who you were bidding against? And contacting 666's owner, really? How would they know about the "spite bidding"?? Were you expecting Toxx to slide into their DMs to expose all the devilish plans they had of ruining your day like a Team Rocket grunt? That's all your own baseless assumptions getting away from you again. Considering you were the first to call out Toxx in that thread, and apparently already in the mindset they're out to get you, I can't think of a response they could give that WOULDN'T rile you up.
Okay so I've realized most of these posts have since become more rage bait to feed whatever narrative everyone's made for me, and get me riled up to respond in a way that only confirms what they think of me. There's no use in responding to such things because they'll just use whatever I say to further feed some image of me they've already made. First impressions, these just read as bait to me, or whatever. I made my post to get it off my chest, not to "clear the air". I'm not here to feed that so continue thinking what you will of me, but I do want to respond to the 100x666 part.
When I went to bid on 100x666, I was NOT aware that Toxx was going to bid on the dragon. They appeared right after, and out of concern, I sent a DM to the owner to make sure Toxx had actually showed interest/offered prior to their bid. I got a response back that said, "Yeah they're interested and not trying to spite you I promise. They even made an X number bid prior to the thread being posted." About an hour or so later, the auction runner for 100x777 sent their OWN DM that was apologizing for what happened to the auction and that for what it's worth Toxx was also planning on buying 100x666. Two different people confirmed but I didn't get the second confirmation from the previous auction runner until after I voiced my concern. I was not expecting Toxx to slide into DMs, but I thought maybe they may be a little upset and possibly seeking a reaction out of me like the users on here now are.
There was exactly one response to you that was inflammatory and it was pretty mild, all things considered.
We are telling you why your behavior came off the way it did in the hopes that you will step back and re-evaluate how you communicate online in the future so that thing kind of thing doesn't happen again. That's not "rage bait," that's trying to explain to you what went down here from outside perspectives.
Your emotional trauma related to whaling doesn't give you a blank check to talk like you're someone's concerned mother over something that, at the end of the day, is a non-issue. But you came in here and proceeded to go into even more detail about why you feel you should be allowed to do exactly that. That's a large part of why the reception hasn't been all open arms and hugs.
That's not remotely what "ragebait" means and I'm not sure what you were expecting. This is a public forum, not your personal diary, and all of this could've been avoided if you'd kept this in mind when responding both here and on the FR thread. You post and deanonymize yourself on a drama community, you are going to get responses, and not all of them are going to be favorable. Doubling down on pretty much everything you were being accused of tends to make that most of them. Frankly, as far as salt forums go, this one is relatively very civil, so if you're just going to stick your fingers in your ears and dismiss it all as "bait" and "trolls" including the more constructive comments, don't be surprised when more and more users start to avoid and think less of you in the future.
And like another anon pointed out, your stated motives contradict each other left and right, because if you weren't here to "clear the air" you sure as hell wouldn't be responding to me right now.
What you were thinking at the time of bidding is irrelevant and I don't know why you brought it up, but let's get this new context straight - not one, but TWO sellers corroborated that Toxx 1) was planning to get the other dragon all along and 2) said nothing remotely suspicious or inflammatory about you to anyone, in public or private, and you STILL came in here commenting "I'm fairly certain they were attempting to rile me up again"? Because holy fucking shit, dude. If nothing else, surely now you can see where the "self-important" and "baseless assumptions" come from?
my brother in arcanist, what the hell are you talking about?
"most of these posts have since become more rage bait to feed whatever narrative everyone's made for me"? "and get me riled up to respond in a way that only confirms what they think of me"? "they'll just use whatever I say to further feed some image of me they've already made"?
no, dude, you're doing a fine job of giving us the image and narrative we should have of you with your own imagined heroism. you're creating villains out of the anons here because we don't immediately kowtow to your version of events and lived experiences, and making a worse villain out of toxx for miswording something badly. i GET what upsets you and empathize deeply - i'm a recovered gambling addict - but you are going about your traumas in the wrong way by getting far too involved in the lives of perfect strangers on the internet you have no business lecturing. people who care about your reasons can and will seek you out if they want to know why you feel the way you do.
"I made my post to get it off my chest, not to 'clear the air'"?
then WHY did you come HERE, specifically, where people were already heavily critical of you? you've explained to us about your reasons (which we already knew since you overshared about them in the auction thread, if vaguely) TWICE now, and you don't think that's a desperate attempt to clear the air? you 'get things off your chest' to people who care and your personal religious leaders to absolve yourself of regrets, not to people who you personally believe have a less than stellar idea of you and are currently talking about your observed public actions.
"I'm not here to feed that so continue thinking what you will of me"?
then just shut up and leave! there's no reason to stick around and continue saying so damn much! no need to announce that you're exiting the conversation; just go! you're a whole individual who shouldn't need acknowledgement that you're leaving!
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 12:38 pm (UTC)(link)If you're willing to take some well-meaning advice: All your posts, both this one and those in the auction thread, would be massively better off cut down to the bare minimum needed for effective and semi-respectful communication. Do not compulsively expose every detail of your thought process and life story to strangers, especially if or when you cannot help yourself from emotionally charging it, coming off the way you just did, and doing more harm than good. As you yourself acknowledged but didn't really adapt the mindset behind in the same post, "you're kind of a dick, bye" and "this gives me pause for personal reasons so I'm withdrawing" are infinitely more valid and sympathetic than "wow, money for a dragon png, have you no shame, I, the sensible, frugal and benevolent party, am declaring you a pitiable fool and a danger to yourself and myself better than supporting these self-destructive impulses because here's how much me and my husband bought a house for and also most of my friends except two or three are also poor, something something my hopes and dreams, I don't know if you own a car or not but do you realize this money would be better off buying a car, I sure would love one, dear Lord the children in Africa are starving,
Also wat @ the 666 auction part. "There is no malicious intent, but I am fairly certain there is malicious intent"?? I'd understand the concern if the auction were for some completely unrelated dragon they just so mysteriously happened to follow you into, but there's nothing unusual about two people who were gunning hardcore for a specific ID both moving on to the next best thing after the first seller dropped out. Didn't you just quote 777's owner telling you outright Toxx was planning to buy other dragons like this before you even learned who you were bidding against? And contacting 666's owner, really? How would they know about the "spite bidding"?? Were you expecting Toxx to slide into their DMs to expose all the devilish plans they had of ruining your day like a Team Rocket grunt? That's all your own baseless assumptions getting away from you again. Considering you were the first to call out Toxx in that thread, and apparently already in the mindset they're out to get you, I can't think of a response they could give that WOULDN'T rile you up.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 01:59 pm (UTC)(link)When I went to bid on 100x666, I was NOT aware that Toxx was going to bid on the dragon. They appeared right after, and out of concern, I sent a DM to the owner to make sure Toxx had actually showed interest/offered prior to their bid. I got a response back that said, "Yeah they're interested and not trying to spite you I promise. They even made an X number bid prior to the thread being posted." About an hour or so later, the auction runner for 100x777 sent their OWN DM that was apologizing for what happened to the auction and that for what it's worth Toxx was also planning on buying 100x666. Two different people confirmed but I didn't get the second confirmation from the previous auction runner until after I voiced my concern. I was not expecting Toxx to slide into DMs, but I thought maybe they may be a little upset and possibly seeking a reaction out of me like the users on here now are.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 03:21 pm (UTC)(link)We are telling you why your behavior came off the way it did in the hopes that you will step back and re-evaluate how you communicate online in the future so that thing kind of thing doesn't happen again. That's not "rage bait," that's trying to explain to you what went down here from outside perspectives.
Your emotional trauma related to whaling doesn't give you a blank check to talk like you're someone's concerned mother over something that, at the end of the day, is a non-issue. But you came in here and proceeded to go into even more detail about why you feel you should be allowed to do exactly that. That's a large part of why the reception hasn't been all open arms and hugs.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-08 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)And like another anon pointed out, your stated motives contradict each other left and right, because if you weren't here to "clear the air" you sure as hell wouldn't be responding to me right now.
What you were thinking at the time of bidding is irrelevant and I don't know why you brought it up, but let's get this new context straight - not one, but TWO sellers corroborated that Toxx 1) was planning to get the other dragon all along and 2) said nothing remotely suspicious or inflammatory about you to anyone, in public or private, and you STILL came in here commenting "I'm fairly certain they were attempting to rile me up again"? Because holy fucking shit, dude. If nothing else, surely now you can see where the "self-important" and "baseless assumptions" come from?
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 12:16 am (UTC)(link)"most of these posts have since become more rage bait to feed whatever narrative everyone's made for me"?
"and get me riled up to respond in a way that only confirms what they think of me"?
"they'll just use whatever I say to further feed some image of me they've already made"?
no, dude, you're doing a fine job of giving us the image and narrative we should have of you with your own imagined heroism. you're creating villains out of the anons here because we don't immediately kowtow to your version of events and lived experiences, and making a worse villain out of toxx for miswording something badly. i GET what upsets you and empathize deeply - i'm a recovered gambling addict - but you are going about your traumas in the wrong way by getting far too involved in the lives of perfect strangers on the internet you have no business lecturing. people who care about your reasons can and will seek you out if they want to know why you feel the way you do.
"I made my post to get it off my chest, not to 'clear the air'"?
then WHY did you come HERE, specifically, where people were already heavily critical of you? you've explained to us about your reasons (which we already knew since you overshared about them in the auction thread, if vaguely) TWICE now, and you don't think that's a desperate attempt to clear the air? you 'get things off your chest' to people who care and your personal religious leaders to absolve yourself of regrets, not to people who you personally believe have a less than stellar idea of you and are currently talking about your observed public actions.
"I'm not here to feed that so continue thinking what you will of me"?
then just shut up and leave! there's no reason to stick around and continue saying so damn much! no need to announce that you're exiting the conversation; just go! you're a whole individual who shouldn't need acknowledgement that you're leaving!
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 04:46 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 05:30 am (UTC)(link)actually, i'm not! i'm just a jokester who likes to make arcanist jesus jokes.