I don't know HTML formatting. If I could bold/italicize/underline things I could and I'm trying to limit caps to reduce the amount of "yelling" tone it can represent.
Replying to myself because trying to respond to a single individual, let alone multiple, is a fool's errand. I'm mostly responding because I feel like I didn't convey some of my thoughts/opinions correctly. I am not actively upset or mad or venting or whatever anymore (a lot of the initial post carried my residual frustrations and was venting to vent), and I apologize if my tone comes off as such now. It's not hanging on my mind anymore. I just feel like replying to a couple things I read after work.
I'm also limiting what I'm going to address here. I could respond to everything thrown at me but I won't mostly because I don't want to put forth the energy. I want to say some of you have made good arguments and points I can agree with in a way that doesn't feel like an attack and that I am going to try and reflect on those. Then there are others I still personally read as more trying to be more aggressive and feel like they're trying to get me to act/react a certain way. So I'm going to TRY and keep this as short a possible.
First, some of you are making the same exact assumptions about my own financial situation and circumstances. A lot of you are also telling me exactly what I should do and the """correct""" way I should have approached things. I came here to vent frustrations and get them off my chest because my usual methods I use weren't working so I made the decision to let this be torn into.
Also I realize I worded it horribly but $3k was HALF of what we paid and $3k was an amount I paid (aka: my own finances; we went 50/50 on all costs; ~6k was purely downpayment), it IS a house, and we did have a first-time homebuyers program we went through in order to afford it. This was a weird thing to see so many people hung up on, and I'm also not liking where some of the responses went with that. Also we were renting a mobile home prior to the house and it was very nice compared to all the stereotypes associated with them.
And since it's still I guess a bit of the focus, my standing on the whole spending irl money discussion is that there is a difference in if I am directly involved in some capacity or not. Every time someone decides to spend $1k on something I'm not going to swoop in immediately and say they're wrong for it and be better off spending it on XYZ. If I AM involved however, such as this auction, I AM going to feel at least a little responsible that someone HAS to spend a large sum of money to get what we're bidding on due to me continuing to bid. No amount of "it's not your money so it's not your responsibility" won't change how it makes me feel about seeing the behavior. And to the person who told me not to bid on ANY auctions because of this, there's a big difference in $10/1kg, $100/10kg, and $1000/100kg, and I know the average player has a lot easier time acquiring the first two without spending irl money.
Finally, because apparently this is STILL mixed up, there were two completely different contexts for the DMs I sent to first and second auction runners. The first auction runner was continuing an ongoing conversation, asking what my plans had been and were apologizing for cancelling the auction and gave their reasons for cancelling it. I responded and didn't get a reply from the first auctioneer until AFTER the bidding on 100x666 started (and subsequently ended). I got a response from the second auctioneer before the first told me Toxx's own plans to try and get both dragons but not what they intended to do with them. My DM to the second auctioneer basically consisted of, "Hey, this just happened and I saw both of us are in your auction now. Can you confirm that they had genuine interest and aren't participating to possibly spite me?" I knew it was likely we were just interested in the same dragons, but I wanted to make sure because everything else went down right before the auction went live.
I didn't go on some sort of attack against Toxx or the auction runners. I didn't ask if Toxx was spiting me the whole time for the first auction. I didn't even ask the first auctioneer if Toxx wanted 100x666 as well. That piece of information was given separately and entirely unprovoked. For the second auction, I simply wanted to avoid a similar situation in case this DID wind up being related, especially so soon after the 100x777 auction.
That's all I'm addressing here. Anything else I could write about are all topics that will get ripped apart further. All I have left to say is I was definitely in the wrong for my treatment and judgment of Toxx in all of this (even if they are still an asshole in my eyes) and I can accept and agree with some of what was said and try not to repeat it in the future. I think I got the message textually beaten into my skull enough that I'm not letting anyone tell me how to run my life, so I'll try not to do the same.
can someone call someone else a bitch on FRD or something so we can have something else to talk about....... love and light to AIRT but im not reading your novel. genuinely wish you the best with this, dont get me wrong, but this is probably not the place to write essays defending yourself
way more people in this thread need to smoke weed tbh, how the hell did anyone have this many fucks to give about such a silly argument. please go get stoned, kids
html formatting (similar to bbcode on FR, just with different brackets): https://www.dreamwidth.org/support/faqbrowse?faqid=155
tone tags (helpful for clarifying tone when communicating via text): https://tonetags.carrd.co/
i didn't read very far past the first paragraph - seemed like a lot more "I", "me, "I", "I", "myself", "me", "I"... things that anons on the internet don't need or care to know tbh. /neu
hopefully those links are helpful tho? not for this thread (pleaseee just step away, for your own wellbeing /gen) but for future communication. :)
Thank you for both of these links! Honestly I was permanently stepping away from this thread after the last wall (minus this response of course because I appreciate the links) and going back to lurking after this. Thank you for your own concern for my wellbeing and again I apologize if my tone didn't come off as not being all that bothered. I've read and responded to what I felt like there. If someone does bother to read this (or the wall), yeah I was an asshole in this whole thing as well, and I'm trying to take the more reasonable responses and arguments here into myself to prevent this from happening again.
Also I'll do my best to use tone tags if I say anything on here in the future. Last time I attempted to implement them (which was in a Discord server) a lot of the users involved either completely ignored them and refused to pick up what they were or got confused by what anyone who used them were attempting to convey because they didn't know most past commonly used ones. All despite there being an actual pin in said server and the same users hating that they couldn't tell the tone of a message. I'll have to relearn a little myself but I still recognize a good chunk of the ones I've seen here.
Finally, I know I use a lot of I/me/myself in text. It's mostly because in the past when trying to use a mix of it and "you" no one ever took it in a general way (even with "general you" involved) and either took it as me attacking someone specific or using it purely as deflection onto a specific user instead of back on myself. It's another thing I can attempt to use more of in the future should I post here (though not in this specific thread) again. I know it can be seen as selfish or self-centered or whatever but it's better (to me) than being accused of putting words into the mouth of a user not even referred to in a conversation.
omg fucking same. i am a huge yapper sometimes. but also childhood abuse (with gaslighting) means i am compelled to overexplain myself to my own detriment. frequent gaslighting and dismissal/minimization = "here is my essay explaining my feelings, why i have them, why they are valid, dated journal entries proving these feelings are not new, references to prior text conversations on the issue, please believe me i swear i'm not lying or trying to manipulate you, i just have feelings too"
that makes sense! i can definitely emphasize as i do similar things, i think i may just be more aware that posting this kind of thing in most online spaces tends not to help. it usually just escalates the discussion because now you've given everyone even /more/ to pick over and now you have to explain MORE (not saying anyone here has been nitpicky just speaking generally)
i mean hell, i think this subject would have been dropped by now if they didn't respond at all
For what it’s worth, I think you are being reasonable. I would also be uncomfortable bidding against someone who I knew was using real money- it’s not a moral thing to me, it just feels weird.
Take some rest. I am sorry people are making bizarre assumptions about your living situation.
you can think someone in reasonable for feeling uncomfortable bidding against someone dropping rlc while also not turning it into a whole moral crusade in public airing your own dirty laundry and accusing them of like. a gambling addiction and financial insolvency
if strawberry had just been uncomfortable and said im tapping out of the auction thats one thing. alleging shit about toxx says to me that strawberry was trying to guilt toxx into rescinding a bid or somehow prove that strawberry really deserved the dragon or whatever and it was stolen by dirty unfair rlc or whatever. its just cringe tbh
Oh my God shut the hell up. Nothing good ever came of ppl like you showing up to their own wanker thread on this comm. You were better off not ever stepping foot in here, you yammering idiot
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(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 01:45 am (UTC)(link)Replying to myself because trying to respond to a single individual, let alone multiple, is a fool's errand. I'm mostly responding because I feel like I didn't convey some of my thoughts/opinions correctly. I am not actively upset or mad or venting or whatever anymore (a lot of the initial post carried my residual frustrations and was venting to vent), and I apologize if my tone comes off as such now. It's not hanging on my mind anymore. I just feel like replying to a couple things I read after work.
I'm also limiting what I'm going to address here. I could respond to everything thrown at me but I won't mostly because I don't want to put forth the energy. I want to say some of you have made good arguments and points I can agree with in a way that doesn't feel like an attack and that I am going to try and reflect on those. Then there are others I still personally read as more trying to be more aggressive and feel like they're trying to get me to act/react a certain way. So I'm going to TRY and keep this as short a possible.
First, some of you are making the same exact assumptions about my own financial situation and circumstances. A lot of you are also telling me exactly what I should do and the """correct""" way I should have approached things. I came here to vent frustrations and get them off my chest because my usual methods I use weren't working so I made the decision to let this be torn into.
Also I realize I worded it horribly but $3k was HALF of what we paid and $3k was an amount I paid (aka: my own finances; we went 50/50 on all costs; ~6k was purely downpayment), it IS a house, and we did have a first-time homebuyers program we went through in order to afford it. This was a weird thing to see so many people hung up on, and I'm also not liking where some of the responses went with that. Also we were renting a mobile home prior to the house and it was very nice compared to all the stereotypes associated with them.
And since it's still I guess a bit of the focus, my standing on the whole spending irl money discussion is that there is a difference in if I am directly involved in some capacity or not. Every time someone decides to spend $1k on something I'm not going to swoop in immediately and say they're wrong for it and be better off spending it on XYZ. If I AM involved however, such as this auction, I AM going to feel at least a little responsible that someone HAS to spend a large sum of money to get what we're bidding on due to me continuing to bid. No amount of "it's not your money so it's not your responsibility" won't change how it makes me feel about seeing the behavior. And to the person who told me not to bid on ANY auctions because of this, there's a big difference in $10/1kg, $100/10kg, and $1000/100kg, and I know the average player has a lot easier time acquiring the first two without spending irl money.
Finally, because apparently this is STILL mixed up, there were two completely different contexts for the DMs I sent to first and second auction runners. The first auction runner was continuing an ongoing conversation, asking what my plans had been and were apologizing for cancelling the auction and gave their reasons for cancelling it. I responded and didn't get a reply from the first auctioneer until AFTER the bidding on 100x666 started (and subsequently ended). I got a response from the second auctioneer before the first told me Toxx's own plans to try and get both dragons but not what they intended to do with them. My DM to the second auctioneer basically consisted of, "Hey, this just happened and I saw both of us are in your auction now. Can you confirm that they had genuine interest and aren't participating to possibly spite me?" I knew it was likely we were just interested in the same dragons, but I wanted to make sure because everything else went down right before the auction went live.
I didn't go on some sort of attack against Toxx or the auction runners. I didn't ask if Toxx was spiting me the whole time for the first auction. I didn't even ask the first auctioneer if Toxx wanted 100x666 as well. That piece of information was given separately and entirely unprovoked. For the second auction, I simply wanted to avoid a similar situation in case this DID wind up being related, especially so soon after the 100x777 auction.
That's all I'm addressing here. Anything else I could write about are all topics that will get ripped apart further. All I have left to say is I was definitely in the wrong for my treatment and judgment of Toxx in all of this (even if they are still an asshole in my eyes) and I can accept and agree with some of what was said and try not to repeat it in the future. I think I got the message textually beaten into my skull enough that I'm not letting anyone tell me how to run my life, so I'll try not to do the same.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 02:09 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 02:59 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 03:15 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 03:44 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 03:48 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 04:24 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 04:43 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 08:00 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 08:56 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 13:39 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 14:15 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 02:46 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 03:10 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 04:56 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 05:30 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Tonight's strain is Chili Verde, highly recommend, great pain relief without making you stupid.)
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 17:21 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 07:15 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 04:51 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 05:47 am (UTC)(link)https://www.dreamwidth.org/support/faqbrowse?faqid=155
tone tags (helpful for clarifying tone when communicating via text):
https://tonetags.carrd.co/
i didn't read very far past the first paragraph - seemed like a lot more "I", "me, "I", "I", "myself", "me", "I"... things that anons on the internet don't need or care to know tbh. /neu
hopefully those links are helpful tho? not for this thread (pleaseee just step away, for your own wellbeing /gen) but for future communication. :)
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 06:29 am (UTC)(link)Also I'll do my best to use tone tags if I say anything on here in the future. Last time I attempted to implement them (which was in a Discord server) a lot of the users involved either completely ignored them and refused to pick up what they were or got confused by what anyone who used them were attempting to convey because they didn't know most past commonly used ones. All despite there being an actual pin in said server and the same users hating that they couldn't tell the tone of a message. I'll have to relearn a little myself but I still recognize a good chunk of the ones I've seen here.
Finally, I know I use a lot of I/me/myself in text. It's mostly because in the past when trying to use a mix of it and "you" no one ever took it in a general way (even with "general you" involved) and either took it as me attacking someone specific or using it purely as deflection onto a specific user instead of back on myself. It's another thing I can attempt to use more of in the future should I post here (though not in this specific thread) again. I know it can be seen as selfish or self-centered or whatever but it's better (to me) than being accused of putting words into the mouth of a user not even referred to in a conversation.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 07:59 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 06:00 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 06:02 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 06:26 pm (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 18:28 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 22:45 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-09 23:40 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-10 01:07 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-10 01:17 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) - 2025-01-10 08:14 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)that makes sense! i can definitely emphasize as i do similar things, i think i may just be more aware that posting this kind of thing in most online spaces tends not to help. it usually just escalates the discussion because now you've given everyone even /more/ to pick over and now you have to explain MORE (not saying anyone here has been nitpicky just speaking generally)
i mean hell, i think this subject would have been dropped by now if they didn't respond at all
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 12:36 am (UTC)(link)Oh absolutely same, my (OCD and Autism-fueled) constant desire to not be misunderstood results in the same
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 08:27 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-09 11:58 pm (UTC)(link)I would also be uncomfortable bidding against someone who I knew was using real money- it’s not a moral thing to me, it just feels weird.
Take some rest. I am sorry people are making bizarre assumptions about your living situation.
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 06:42 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 06:46 am (UTC)(link)if strawberry had just been uncomfortable and said im tapping out of the auction thats one thing. alleging shit about toxx says to me that strawberry was trying to guilt toxx into rescinding a bid or somehow prove that strawberry really deserved the dragon or whatever and it was stolen by dirty unfair rlc or whatever. its just cringe tbh
(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 12:47 am (UTC)(link)(frozen comment) Re: 100x777 argument
(Anonymous) 2025-01-10 01:12 am (UTC)(link)