oh, it's all fine! thank you for your well wishes. admittedly, i get riled up when people act the way AC does, and i didn't realize i had said what i did until after i came back and saw replies. i acknowledge it's a hell of a line to read; i'm super sorry.
when people use their scrapes with death or terminal condition in a weaponized way to get what they want or as a pass to treat others however they want, others who see that behaviour tend to build up defenses towards patients in the same situation, and it makes finding community and support really hard. i don't blame folks for becoming skeptical as it's typically a defense mechanism because people like AC take advantage of them. it's unfair for everyone on the receiving end, directly and indirectly, and it'd be real nice if AC learned that. they are doing nothing good for themself by acting this way.
DA (I'm the "It’s also worth stating that AC’s perception of things" anon)
Oh, 100% with you. Yeah, I didn't mean to imply that AC *hadn't* been harassed but that's the fault of clunky wording on my part.
But I feel you. I also have some fucked chronic conditions that will only take more from me as time goes on. It is frustrating and harrowing how people treat me because of it! But it doesn't give me the right to hurt other people and use it as an excuse. Which also especially gets to me in AC's case. It is hard to want to make things better for yourself when you've hit AC's point, but the alternative is a really nasty spiral that hurts themself and everyone around them.
As a fellow chronic condition sufferer I am so so sympathetic to that pain, but the sort of downwards spiral being displayed is a real hallmark of an unhealthy coping mechanism. It also takes a lot out of your argument if you start off with “this late-stage capitalism state is denying me treatment” and move into a whine (yes, sorry, a whine, that’s how it reads) about how some other player isn’t doing them free custom art. I’ve definitely had days where I go on a grand old rant about everything going wrong. Sometimes stubbing your toe or internet bad luck is the cherry on the misery cake. But if all you do is cry for sympathy eventually people will get burned out on helping you.
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(frozen comment) Re: AstralCrescent
(Anonymous) 2024-06-28 05:01 pm (UTC)(link)oh, it's all fine! thank you for your well wishes. admittedly, i get riled up when people act the way AC does, and i didn't realize i had said what i did until after i came back and saw replies. i acknowledge it's a hell of a line to read; i'm super sorry.
when people use their scrapes with death or terminal condition in a weaponized way to get what they want or as a pass to treat others however they want, others who see that behaviour tend to build up defenses towards patients in the same situation, and it makes finding community and support really hard. i don't blame folks for becoming skeptical as it's typically a defense mechanism because people like AC take advantage of them. it's unfair for everyone on the receiving end, directly and indirectly, and it'd be real nice if AC learned that. they are doing nothing good for themself by acting this way.
(frozen comment) Re: AstralCrescent
(Anonymous) 2024-06-28 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)Oh, 100% with you. Yeah, I didn't mean to imply that AC *hadn't* been harassed but that's the fault of clunky wording on my part.
But I feel you. I also have some fucked chronic conditions that will only take more from me as time goes on. It is frustrating and harrowing how people treat me because of it! But it doesn't give me the right to hurt other people and use it as an excuse. Which also especially gets to me in AC's case. It is hard to want to make things better for yourself when you've hit AC's point, but the alternative is a really nasty spiral that hurts themself and everyone around them.
(frozen comment) Re: AstralCrescent
(Anonymous) 2024-06-28 11:12 pm (UTC)(link)As a fellow chronic condition sufferer I am so so sympathetic to that pain, but the sort of downwards spiral being displayed is a real hallmark of an unhealthy coping mechanism. It also takes a lot out of your argument if you start off with “this late-stage capitalism state is denying me treatment” and move into a whine (yes, sorry, a whine, that’s how it reads) about how some other player isn’t doing them free custom art. I’ve definitely had days where I go on a grand old rant about everything going wrong. Sometimes stubbing your toe or internet bad luck is the cherry on the misery cake. But if all you do is cry for sympathy eventually people will get burned out on helping you.