anonrerising | 1: Let There Be Salt

I'm 27 and it astounds me how young so many rock stars and pop stars were. While I know I'm expected to have a fun life ahead of me, I feel like the fun part of my life is over. Feel like I could have partied more in college but I had health/time management issues. How do I get over that?

Same age. I wish I had the answer for you. :(

I'm 30 but I can definitely say there are still plenty of parties for people our age. Granted they're a little harder to find since you can't just join a random campus and sniff out a good time. You just gotta find the right people to branch off to and find the good stuff. Also the alcohol tends to be better quality than in college days lol..

It also helps to realize that there is more to life than just having parties for fun. Now that I am much more secure in both maturity and finance thanks to my steady job I branch out and find other cool things to get into like boating trips, Disney World (I live 30 minutes away from it), going to the beach whenever I feel like because I have my own money and car... I don't know, life is just good, lol.

did you actually want to party more, at the time?

or is that a feeling that pops up only when comparing your life to other lives?

Yes I do want to party more. What's up with introverts deciding that people don't have a real desire to do so?

ayrt

sheesh what's with the hostility????

i asked "did" because i was working with the limited information your post provided and wanted to clarify where your dissatisfaction come from,

as in, did you feel, at the time, that you were getting your fill of partying and were at the time satisfied with how your life unfolded and only now, in the present time, in hindsight do you wish you had done things different

OR

did you always feel like you weren't doing enough

what i was trying to get at is that comparison is the thief of joy and all that but if you are going to be like that nevermind

Yes I have enjoyed partying. I haven't done it as much as I wanted because of time management/availability/health issues.

If you want to say not to compare, that's fine. But I don't see what bringing up your awesome story has to do with anything? Of course you don't want to party anymore because you had your share. What does that have to do with people who didn't have the opportunity to?

ayrt

??? i never said anything about partying myself, are you replying to the wrong anon?

na from op's replies in this thread she's a bitter bitch so don't feel bad or anythin

ayrt

yeahhh

i was going to point out that it's common at this age to look back on one's life trajectory and feel all like "oh dang i'm no longer young" and try to figure out if one lived life "right" or not, so i wanted to make sure if op's question was that

OR if it was more about the health issues/circumstances making them feel, back when they were young, that they were missing out compared to their peers

because those scenarios would require different approaches because one is you know mortality and legacy involved and the other more formative and coming to terms with the circumstances you were born into

NAYRT

Yeah, as they say: hindsight is 20/20!

As already mentioned, OP is being super bitter for some reason and not giving us much info to go off of. The only time we get anything about them is a little snippet wrapped up in a scathing remark. It's kind of frustrating. We obviously want to help but each problem has its own solution. :/

you sound like a bitch

whoa jeez...remember that you're on an anoncomm and no one knows who you are. Youre asking for help but give these people very little context about yourself so they're trying to feel for you to see what advice would be most helpful. Don't be such a dickweed

How is smugly saying "The grass is greener on the other side" supposed to be good advice?

I had to re-read the post you are referring to multiple times to try and find where the smugness was and still couldn't find it. Also, of all the advice on this thread has given, that's the one thing that stood out for you to comment on? lol

The real fun starts when you don't have to decide between paying your bills and buying food.

Honestly? I don't think the feeling ever goes away. I did my hard partying, experimenting and drinking between the ages of 15 and 19 (being European), stopped partying completely when I was 20 (while others were just starting) and trying to catch up on life (studying, working, developing relationships, traveling). Even though logically I know I didn't miss anything by abstaining after turning 20, I feel like I did because other people went about their life differently.

I'm 30 and only now starting to get serious about getting a permanent job and hobbies, maybe even start dating, and I feel like I'm behind on so many things. Yet when new people meet me they're always impressed by how much I've traveled and experienced.

The grass is always greener on the other side.

Somewhat related: my dad was one of those absurdly young rock musicians in the 70s and now works in a completely different field. I think he's counting down the days until he can retire so he can go back to fiddling with his guitar.

This sounds like a humblebrag tbh. I never got my serious partying or career phase. So I'm behind on both. Good for you that you got to have your fun though. Imo, people who travel a lot tend to be people with rich parents, middle class people who seek out jobs abroad and have decent economic security, or Australian.

ayrt

I funded my traveling by waiting tables, working in seedy hotels, bars and laundromats, because those were the only jobs available to me without the right papers or the right kind of education.
I got cheated out of a lot of money by my employers, and then got assaulted (physically, sexually, you name it) and treated like shit by customers. I still suffer from PTSD because of it. Still, I got to see new places and met some wonderful people who I will always remember fondly. Was it worth it and would I do it again? I honestly don't know.

And as for my "fun" partying... The reason I stopped was less to do with having had my fill, and more to do with developing alcoholism and drug habits.

My point is, there are a lot of approaches to life and it's not good for your mental health to dwell on "what could have been". One part of your life being closed doesn't mean you're cut off from further experiences later down in life.

nayrt

I want to put a disclaimer here and say that I do not know your mental health status or much of anything at all about you so take my advice with a grain of salt. If it doesn't apply to you for any reason, then it simply doesn't apply and that's that. I am not after you in any way.

You mentioned that you're behind in both career and partying so:

To get a decent job to help fuel your party life you can always broaden your horizons and seek getting into a trade or certain certification to up your salary. Observe the economical trends of your country and see what jobs are sought after but easily obtainable. You'd be surprised, and some of them are easy to get training/certifications for if you know how to research for it. Knowing the laws, regulations, and even how loans work in your area/country help too. Some things are self taught that can boost your salary like knowing how excel spreadsheets work. (this personally allowed me to rub elbows with the higher ups of my career...hell yeah.. you want a spreadsheet that can filter info for you with one click? I got you baby) All of what I mentioned requires elbow grease though, which sucks.

Oh, and as for the parties, getting into decent 'adult' parties takes quite a bit of time to develop a social web for, but from my experience attending things like live concerts and sporting events helps to fill the void a little in the meantime. Plenty of people, plenty of drinking! But yeah, meet enough cool people in your area and there's a BBQ or some party going on almost every weekend popping up on your social feed.

(on a side note I came from a poor family and am doing well in my early 30's to be able to travel so don't make dumb assumptions tyty)

1: Let There Be Salt

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