I will be honest, I don't think so. A lot of the folks that talk loudly about AI girlfriends and act like that? They aren't looking for a actual equal or partner. And I frankly wouldn't want to be a human in a relationship with someone like that. Let them mistreat an AI.
I just fear the desire for the relationship to begin with is going down because social media is a genuine psyop in which we're being conditioned to hate other humans. "Don't use it then" I'm trying to as minimally as possible, I honestly can't withstand it for sustained periods anyway (because of what I'm describing), but that doesn't stop the fact that literal billions of other people are still actively using it and being exposed to this extremely harmful rhetoric
Even just friendships seem so much harder to make though. People just... don't want to talk to each other. It's all heads down, look at phone. I'm an autist trying to learn how to socialize and it's like how tf are you supposed to learn how to do that these days??? No one else my age knows how to either! But I quite literally can't live alone! It's unaffordable! If I'm to ever move out, I NEED roommates, and for me to get roommates I'm comfortable with I want them to be my friends... but how tf do you make friends in person these days ðŸ˜
the "people are only looking at their phones" complaint has been around for at least 20 years and the answer is the same as when people were blaming television or magazines or books.
take classes or join groups where you have a shared interest in what is happening or being done. I guarantee you will be able to chat more earnestly and helpfully with somebody there then trying to chat up random strangers in the wild and being in a group together is how friendships start outside of school or work.
Then what? How do you when to ask someone for their number? How do you know when it's safe to consider someone a "friend"? You are talking to an autistic person. I fundamentally cannot comprehend these things.
Honestly? Us neurotypical people don't have a clue either. Truly. We do a lot of guessing. But I do have two recommendations:
1. If someone keeps specifically finding you to talk to, it's a good sign. Conversely, if you're always the one starting the conversations, that's usually a good sign that you're more interested than they are. Specifically, I'd recommend the 3-1 rule: if they have not initiated some form of conversation by the time you have initiated 3, they're not as interested and you should step back.
2. Accept at the outset that there's going to be discomfort involved. Nobody likes being rejected - and I mean that in the broadest sense of the term, not just the romantic one. Be okay with hearing "no thank you, I'm not interested in hanging out". Once you're okay with that, you will gain the ability to be able to ask people to do things in the clearest terms possible. The majority of emotion heavy language and body language that can be confusing come down to signalling that someone is or is not rejected with out straight up saying it out loud. Find yourself a person or two you can trust to honestly and bluntly tell you "I'm not feeling up for that today, but I'd love to reschedule for tomorrow" because they know you'll be cool with it and you're in good shape.
But even if you keep talking to someone how do you get to the point of expressing "I want to be your friend"? The idea of asking someone for their number or something is utterly terrifying. And you could ask "well, how did people end up becoming your friend?" and the truth is, I can't remember, because I have not maintained a friendship since childhood and every single one of those had someone else approaching me. Or, I was grouped with them somehow. And to be as socially inept as I am at my age is just... not acceptable. It's not. I give off immediate "socially stunted weirdo" vibes because that is exactly what I am. I stutter a whole lot. I don't know how to carry conversations. I HATE small talk. My vocabulary is weird. I don't know how to enter a conversation without being immediate "red flag".
To say it's been a complaint for 20 years is true, but to say it hasn't gotten worse isn't. It has most definitely gotten worse within the past 10 or so years. I mean look what's happened to sites like Twitter and Facebook. These sites and and apps are all designed in ways that harm you psychologically. Whether people notice it or not. Posts that get the most engagement are what ends up on people's feeds, and what gets people engaging? Stuff that makes them mad. So now we've got a sea of content designed solely to make people argue with each other and believe certain things about certain groups. Aaand it's gotten us... where we are now. Not great.
sa Also to add, the internet wasn't always as heavily monetized as it was now. We've got TikTok accounts dedicated to posting ragebait because making content that pisses people off is what gets views and views are what gets you paid. It's so fucked
Cool article that just popped up on my Chrome feed today https://www.ibtimes.co.uk/teen-boys-ditch-real-girlfriends-ai-chatbots-uk-ban-horizon-1751163
Yeah we're so fucked lmao. And people like to think this is a uniquely male phenomenon, it's not. I have seen just as many posts from women showing off their buff half-centaur half-elf "husbands".
(That article's shit and may very well be AI generated itself but that's the one Google gave me - the better written one is the Guardian article that article links to)
Idk why you're A. being so aggressive and B. acting like there isn't a genuine HUMAN (not male, HUMAN) loneliness epidemic happening right now that yes, is getting worse.
How old are you? Have you been amongst younger demographics recently? Mental illness is absolutely rampant. There is a reason it is becoming more common.
You can say the same thing about yourself since you're getting so pissed. Log off instead of getting mad at online strangers, then.
Why do you think the state of the world is why it is right now? Do you not think social media is a very large contributor to that fact?
"Uhm but TV" Was TV originally designed with algorithms intended to feed you ragebait to keep you watching? No. Did those types of programming exist? Sure, but they weren't being directly fed to you. Nowadays you make an account on something, the algorithm is designed to show you something negative. Do you not think that's impacting people's mental health negatively?
Look, I don't want to toe the political line, but why do you think school shootings have become so common? Don't be obtuse and say they existed before - they are a significantly bigger problem now then they were, say, 30 years ago. Why do you think that is?
I just don't understand why you're so insistent that these problems aren't real and aren't things to be genuinely concerned about?
And since I fear you're going to be intentionally obtuse again, I'll preface before you respond- No, I'm not saying AI specfically is the cause of school shootings. Modern social media, though? That is absolutely, undeniably a contributing factor. And what else does social media contribute to? Alienation. Loneliness. We see awful shit and it makes us afraid of people. So we want to talk to them less. People get lonely, they don't want to talk to real people because they're afraid of the potential rejection and mockery they see online, they confide in an AI instead, that AI only further alienates them and reaffirms their delusions.
No, human loneliness is obviously not new. But at the scale we're seeing it right now? Yes, that's new, and yes, it is a problem.
if you'd step off your social media feed for 5 seconds and maybe read a couple of books or even watch a damn documentary if your attention span is that bad, you'd realize that you're not only participating in a game of blame shifting but contributing to the reason the issues continue to exist.
it's easy to sit back and blame social media for all the world's ills. i'm not saying social media hasn't contributed to some problems and perhaps put a spotlight on others but it's not this monolithic failing of civilization.
at least not anymore so than anything else that's been blamed in the past for "humanity failing" such as video games, tv, rock music, or D&D. it's just another scapegoat.
also are you seriously going to sit there and try to say that modern social media is the main reason for school shootings??? what the fuck is wrong with you?? this kind of stupid shit is why we don't have the damn gun control we should have. because idiots like you blame it on social media, or video games, or tv, and not the fact that assault rifles shouldn't be sold to the public.
modern social media has only been a thing since the late 00s/early 10s, and that's being generous. many of the largest school shootings happened way before modern social media began being commercialized the way it is now and they all had absolutely no connection to social media. like go read a damn book before you say stupid shit like this.
sa and to go back to my original point since you seem to lack reading comprehension skills i was objecting to the idea of using a shitty, likely AI generated click-bait article as an indicator of the world being shitty. because it's not?
you're literally perpetuating the cycle by doing dumb shit like that. how can you be like, "gee social media sure is making us feel like shit" and then go "man, check out this article obviously and deliberately crafted to make people feel like shit sure is spitting facts" and not realize what the actual problem is?
The Snapewives managed to do their whole .....thing without AI. I remember being a kid and seeing weird headlines about some rando making the news on sensationalist sites for wanting to be in a relationship with a figurine or whatever.
I don't want a relationship because I've allowed myself to realize I'm not actually cut out for the default two-kids-and-picket-fence model of western adulthood! Genuinely actually not sarcastic no shade to queer people who do want that, but it genuinely doesn't work for some of us and more of us are realizing we're ALLOWED to say no!
Up to you if you wanna say me finding out about aromanticism is a social media psyop.
I struggled with amatonormativity for a LONG time, to the point of it affecting my mental health, because I didn't know what I was doing wrong to keep failing in my relationships.
Now? I'm living with four of my closest friends in a platonic/fwb polycule and I have never been happier.
yeah, the internet has been useful to realize thta there are more people out there who are some variety of aroace than society would have us believe
how many people went through life thinking of romance as an inconvenient ritual to get a family? how many weren't interested in pairing up at all but it was frowned upon (or made survival tougher, depending on the region and time) to stay alone?
how many "ugh, married life sucks" jokes and grousing was actually people being forced to live a life they wouldn't have chosen had they had the knowledge and opportunity not to?
Exactly!! After one failed marriage, two ended engagements, and a long term partnership ending in disaster, I was talking to one of the friends I now live with, and they said
"Have you considered that you might be aromantic or some variety thereof?"
Despite having known about aro folks for well over a decade, I didn't even really think about ME being some form of aro- it's confusing enough being asexual!!
It's why I am always trying to spread awareness, because you never know who might see it and realize "Oh shit, this might be me??"
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Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 03:17 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 04:17 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 05:14 pm (UTC)(link)I don't need to force myself into a mold for someone. I can be happy without that. I have other kinds of social connections, and I am fine.
It's not just AI.
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 05:26 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 06:54 pm (UTC)(link)take classes or join groups where you have a shared interest in what is happening or being done. I guarantee you will be able to chat more earnestly and helpfully with somebody there then trying to chat up random strangers in the wild and being in a group together is how friendships start outside of school or work.
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 08:07 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 08:10 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 01:21 am (UTC)(link)1. If someone keeps specifically finding you to talk to, it's a good sign. Conversely, if you're always the one starting the conversations, that's usually a good sign that you're more interested than they are. Specifically, I'd recommend the 3-1 rule: if they have not initiated some form of conversation by the time you have initiated 3, they're not as interested and you should step back.
2. Accept at the outset that there's going to be discomfort involved. Nobody likes being rejected - and I mean that in the broadest sense of the term, not just the romantic one. Be okay with hearing "no thank you, I'm not interested in hanging out". Once you're okay with that, you will gain the ability to be able to ask people to do things in the clearest terms possible. The majority of emotion heavy language and body language that can be confusing come down to signalling that someone is or is not rejected with out straight up saying it out loud. Find yourself a person or two you can trust to honestly and bluntly tell you "I'm not feeling up for that today, but I'd love to reschedule for tomorrow" because they know you'll be cool with it and you're in good shape.
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 03:43 am (UTC)(link)And to be as socially inept as I am at my age is just... not acceptable. It's not. I give off immediate "socially stunted weirdo" vibes because that is exactly what I am. I stutter a whole lot. I don't know how to carry conversations. I HATE small talk. My vocabulary is weird. I don't know how to enter a conversation without being immediate "red flag".
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 04:55 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-11-02 01:53 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 10:11 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)You didn't hear about MySpace causing this shit 🙃
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-29 22:48 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-29 22:53 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-29 22:55 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-29 23:02 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 00:15 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
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(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 02:32 (UTC) - ExpandRe: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-29 10:52 pm (UTC)(link)Also to add, the internet wasn't always as heavily monetized as it was now. We've got TikTok accounts dedicated to posting ragebait because making content that pisses people off is what gets views and views are what gets you paid. It's so fucked
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 04:39 pm (UTC)(link)https://www.ibtimes.co.uk/teen-boys-ditch-real-girlfriends-ai-chatbots-uk-ban-horizon-1751163
Yeah we're so fucked lmao. And people like to think this is a uniquely male phenomenon, it's not. I have seen just as many posts from women showing off their buff half-centaur half-elf "husbands".
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 04:47 pm (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 06:04 pm (UTC)(link)people with social issues have always looked for inanimate replacements to their own detriment.
why do you think blow-up dolls exist? or did you think all those movies about people treating them like real people was exaggerated?
also women having mythical creatures for their own fantasies like be for real this shit ain't new?
do some research and learn something instead of doom-scrolling and reading shittily written and badly researched click-bait.
(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 07:20 pm (UTC)(link)How old are you? Have you been amongst younger demographics recently? Mental illness is absolutely rampant. There is a reason it is becoming more common.
You can say the same thing about yourself since you're getting so pissed. Log off instead of getting mad at online strangers, then.
Why do you think the state of the world is why it is right now? Do you not think social media is a very large contributor to that fact?
"Uhm but TV" Was TV originally designed with algorithms intended to feed you ragebait to keep you watching? No. Did those types of programming exist? Sure, but they weren't being directly fed to you. Nowadays you make an account on something, the algorithm is designed to show you something negative. Do you not think that's impacting people's mental health negatively?
Look, I don't want to toe the political line, but why do you think school shootings have become so common? Don't be obtuse and say they existed before - they are a significantly bigger problem now then they were, say, 30 years ago. Why do you think that is?
I just don't understand why you're so insistent that these problems aren't real and aren't things to be genuinely concerned about?
(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 08:11 pm (UTC)(link)No, I'm not saying AI specfically is the cause of school shootings. Modern social media, though? That is absolutely, undeniably a contributing factor.
And what else does social media contribute to? Alienation. Loneliness. We see awful shit and it makes us afraid of people. So we want to talk to them less.
People get lonely, they don't want to talk to real people because they're afraid of the potential rejection and mockery they see online, they confide in an AI instead, that AI only further alienates them and reaffirms their delusions.
No, human loneliness is obviously not new. But at the scale we're seeing it right now? Yes, that's new, and yes, it is a problem.
(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 08:47 pm (UTC)(link)if you'd step off your social media feed for 5 seconds and maybe read a couple of books or even watch a damn documentary if your attention span is that bad, you'd realize that you're not only participating in a game of blame shifting but contributing to the reason the issues continue to exist.
it's easy to sit back and blame social media for all the world's ills. i'm not saying social media hasn't contributed to some problems and perhaps put a spotlight on others but it's not this monolithic failing of civilization.
at least not anymore so than anything else that's been blamed in the past for "humanity failing" such as video games, tv, rock music, or D&D. it's just another scapegoat.
also are you seriously going to sit there and try to say that modern social media is the main reason for school shootings??? what the fuck is wrong with you?? this kind of stupid shit is why we don't have the damn gun control we should have. because idiots like you blame it on social media, or video games, or tv, and not the fact that assault rifles shouldn't be sold to the public.
modern social media has only been a thing since the late 00s/early 10s, and that's being generous. many of the largest school shootings happened way before modern social media began being commercialized the way it is now and they all had absolutely no connection to social media. like go read a damn book before you say stupid shit like this.
(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 21:47 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 21:59 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:20 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:24 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:30 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:31 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:16 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-31 00:13 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-10-30 08:51 pm (UTC)(link)you're literally perpetuating the cycle by doing dumb shit like that. how can you be like, "gee social media sure is making us feel like shit" and then go "man, check out this article obviously and deliberately crafted to make people feel like shit sure is spitting facts" and not realize what the actual problem is?
stop buying into the bullshit!!!
(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 21:42 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:25 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:34 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 22:41 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) - 2025-10-30 23:49 (UTC) - Expand(frozen comment) Re: OT Thread
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-11-01 11:38 am (UTC)(link)Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-11-01 11:35 am (UTC)(link)Up to you if you wanna say me finding out about aromanticism is a social media psyop.
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-11-01 01:43 pm (UTC)(link)I struggled with amatonormativity for a LONG time, to the point of it affecting my mental health, because I didn't know what I was doing wrong to keep failing in my relationships.
Now? I'm living with four of my closest friends in a platonic/fwb polycule and I have never been happier.
Romance ain't for me, but platonic love is. ♥
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-11-01 02:31 pm (UTC)(link)how many people went through life thinking of romance as an inconvenient ritual to get a family? how many weren't interested in pairing up at all but it was frowned upon (or made survival tougher, depending on the region and time) to stay alone?
how many "ugh, married life sucks" jokes and grousing was actually people being forced to live a life they wouldn't have chosen had they had the knowledge and opportunity not to?
Re: OT Thread
(Anonymous) 2025-11-01 03:20 pm (UTC)(link)Exactly!! After one failed marriage, two ended engagements, and a long term partnership ending in disaster, I was talking to one of the friends I now live with, and they said
"Have you considered that you might be aromantic or some variety thereof?"
Despite having known about aro folks for well over a decade, I didn't even really think about ME being some form of aro- it's confusing enough being asexual!!
It's why I am always trying to spread awareness, because you never know who might see it and realize "Oh shit, this might be me??"