My experience with the q-slur crowd is, even if they are not terfs, they've decided that this is the Worst Word Ever and completely unreclaimable. They aren't saying don't use it on them, they're saying don't use it at all. I've rarely run into a person who uses q-slur that doesn't think like that, and think that people using it are either ignorant and in need of education. Or terrible people (and then the accusations of other, truly bad, things starts). This is my lived experience, so it does not apply universally, of course. Maybe I just hang out in the wrong corners of the internet.
Thank you for trying to understand my position here, and for being so civil. If it helps, I do understand your position on it, and would love it to be the true and correct one. It would make the world that much lovelier. I wish you all the best, but I think, like you, I will be ending my part in the discussion here
I wasn't gonna continue, but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry that's been your experience. I've met a lot of really lovely people who are just personally uncomfortable with the word and I really hope you meet nicer people in the future. For what it's worth from one stranger on the internet, you aren't a terrible person for using the word for yourself and I wish you all the best in finding a loving community!
Weirdly enough I’ve had the opposite running into “You ARE queer whether you like it or not :)” types whenever I ask not to be called that. Like yes im trans and hence LGBTQ+ but I don’t want to be called queer. “Whether you like it or not” yeah that’s the point, they’ll respect my pronouns but not the fact that I don’t want that one word used on me? Then they start going on spiels about wanting to eat my kneecaps and sending DMs like QUEER QUEER QUEER QUEER QUEER.
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anonrerising2022-08-02 07:34 pm
Re: not trying to stir anything
(Anonymous) 2022-10-18 12:09 am (UTC)(link)My experience with the q-slur crowd is, even if they are not terfs, they've decided that this is the Worst Word Ever and completely unreclaimable. They aren't saying don't use it on them, they're saying don't use it at all. I've rarely run into a person who uses q-slur that doesn't think like that, and think that people using it are either ignorant and in need of education. Or terrible people (and then the accusations of other, truly bad, things starts). This is my lived experience, so it does not apply universally, of course. Maybe I just hang out in the wrong corners of the internet.
Thank you for trying to understand my position here, and for being so civil. If it helps, I do understand your position on it, and would love it to be the true and correct one. It would make the world that much lovelier. I wish you all the best, but I think, like you, I will be ending my part in the discussion here
Re: not trying to stir anything
(Anonymous) 2022-10-19 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)I wasn't gonna continue, but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry that's been your experience. I've met a lot of really lovely people who are just personally uncomfortable with the word and I really hope you meet nicer people in the future. For what it's worth from one stranger on the internet, you aren't a terrible person for using the word for yourself and I wish you all the best in finding a loving community!
Re: not trying to stir anything
(Anonymous) 2022-10-20 01:54 pm (UTC)(link)It’s kind of pathetic
Re: not trying to stir anything
(Anonymous) 2022-10-20 02:00 pm (UTC)(link)There's people on both sides really fanning the flames here, it didn't become such a Discourse topic out of nowhere.