But that's not what OP said- and I promise I'm not trying to nitpick semantics, but this just seems like someone trying to set a boundary. Is it really fair to assume every person who says something along the lines of "Please don't call me queer, I prefer the term lesbian" is dogwhistling? How are they supposed to set that boundary without saying anything remotely along the lines of that?
I feel like when we apply "x is a dogwhistle" beyond what the original phrase was we have to be mindful of when we are going so far, to the point where we're applying it to people who are in fact the victims of the group we're saying they are. A close friend of mine has had people call her a terf for simply requesting that people not call her (her personally) queer -nothing more- and she's a trans lesbian. It's fine if you're just pointing it out, as you say, but other people very quickly latched onto other, entirely unrelated things as "evidence". Idk if my opinion will effect anyone but I feel like our kneejerk reaction shouldn't be to demonize fellow community members. Obviously if someone shows you who they really are, believe them, but I feel like it's disingenous to say things like "well I'm just pointing it out" when there's an obvious accusation behind stating someone is using a terf dogwhistle like that.
Ofc you don't have to agree with me, it's just my opinion and all that but I don't think we should be tearing each other to pieces over little things like this instead of just like. Talking to each other.
Re: not trying to stir anything
But that's not what OP said- and I promise I'm not trying to nitpick semantics, but this just seems like someone trying to set a boundary. Is it really fair to assume every person who says something along the lines of "Please don't call me queer, I prefer the term lesbian" is dogwhistling? How are they supposed to set that boundary without saying anything remotely along the lines of that?
I feel like when we apply "x is a dogwhistle" beyond what the original phrase was we have to be mindful of when we are going so far, to the point where we're applying it to people who are in fact the victims of the group we're saying they are. A close friend of mine has had people call her a terf for simply requesting that people not call her (her personally) queer -nothing more- and she's a trans lesbian. It's fine if you're just pointing it out, as you say, but other people very quickly latched onto other, entirely unrelated things as "evidence". Idk if my opinion will effect anyone but I feel like our kneejerk reaction shouldn't be to demonize fellow community members. Obviously if someone shows you who they really are, believe them, but I feel like it's disingenous to say things like "well I'm just pointing it out" when there's an obvious accusation behind stating someone is using a terf dogwhistle like that.
Ofc you don't have to agree with me, it's just my opinion and all that but I don't think we should be tearing each other to pieces over little things like this instead of just like. Talking to each other.